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PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

Pudgy meets the Werewolf and Frankenstein
The Paratrooper
The Sky Diver
The Fire Paintings
The Stink Bomb Kid
Pantsed and Hanged
The Cisco Kid
Pudgy Goes to the Big City
Halloween Mischief
The Railroad Kid
The Sea-gull Bombers Revenge
Booger Wall
The Hot Rod Kid
The Bat Cave

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- Pudgy Meets the Werewolf and Frankenstein -

By Richard Logan Brimhall



Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
He had finally made it! He was a genuine, full-fledged member of the marvelous Black Cat Club. Even though his mother had caught him running around naked in broad daylight and spanked his fat, bare, little behind until it was cherry red, he hadn't squealed about the initiation prank that the Black Catters had played on him. He had been strong and true to his fellow Black Catters and he was in!
It was finally Saturday again, and he was at the Black Cat Club House for the weekly 10:00 a.m. Black Cat Club meeting. Everyone was there. Each of the Black Catters gave the secret handshake which was done by scratching each others' palms with their fingernails and giving their best meow. Booper read the minutes from the last meeting, which had ended when Pudgy had bolted naked from the club house. Pudgy had really believed that the old Motorola radio had made him invisible. He had made the painful mistake of not only running around outside naked, but of also calling his Mom an "old bag" because he thought that she couldn't see him.
As the meeting started, all of the Black Catters had a good laugh and congratulated Pudgy on not squealing to his Mom. The minutes of the last meeting also reflected the matter of the $20 dues, in quarters, Pudgy had paid to the club last Saturday. Wee Willie finished reading the minutes, and they were approved. Tubo opened the meeting for any business of the day. Buger Red was the first to pipe up proposing that the whole bunch go to the afternoon movies using some of the newly acquired club dues. The proposal passed with great enthusiasm and after several more items of important business, such as the water snake and pollywog hunt on Wednesday afternoon, they were all off to dig fox holes for the rest of the morning in the vacant lot across the alley from the club house. About noon most of the boys' mothers stepped outside and gave their family's special call, which ranged from whistles to screams, "to come and eat." Everybody agreed to meet at the club house with their roller skates at 12:40 p.m. to go the matinee at the Rialto Theater.
At 12:30 the club house was full of Black Catters sitting on the floor putting on their steel wheeled roller skates. Each boy stuck his feet, one at a time, into a skate, buckled the strap around his ankle, andscrewed the clamps in the front down tightly with the metal key to the soles of his shoes, and they were off. It took about 15 minutes to get to the theater. On the way up the hill they passed the old haunted mansion on Kinsley Avenue. Everybody in the whole club just knew that monsters lived there! They skated by the old, haunted, two-story mansion on the opposite side of the street moving as fast as their little legs and their steel-wheeled skates would allow them as they clickety-clacked down the rough sidewalk.
Four blocks later, they rolled right up to the box office of the Rialto Theater and put down a dime each for their little, red tickets. Pudgy squealed with delight when he saw what was playing. It was Lon Chaney in THE WEREWOLF. The other film was Boris Carloff in FRANKENSTEIN. There were always three comedies and the serial which this month was FLASH GORDON. It had been so long since Pudgy had been to the Saturday matinee -- over a year and a half. He had been saving his weekly quarter allowance for the Black Cat Club entry dues. Every Black Catter headed in towards the snack bar, getting their tickets ripped in half as they went through the door by the smarty-pants, teen-aged ushers. They bought popcorn, Chicken Bone candy sticks, malted milk balls, Nesbit orange sodas or rootbeer, black licorice, Bighunks, and everything else they could get their grubby little paws on. They had plenty of money for a change.
They finally sauntered on into the theater. It was jammed packed with even the balcony as full as could be. They sat in their favorite place -- right down in front, in the middle. The comedies were first; WOODY WOODPECKER, PORKY THE PIG, and then Pudgy's favorite, MIGHTY MOUSE. Pudgy always liked the opera singing at the beginning as Might Mouse swooped into the sky. The twenty minute Flash Gordon serial then followed, and as everyone knew, Flash would survive the fate worse than death that came at the end of each weekly episode.
The first feature was FRANKENSTEIN. As soon as it ended, the house lights came up for intermission. Everyone in the theater seemed to sit still as death for a moment stunned by what they had just witnessed. The Black Catters were the first to make a beeline straight for the snack bar for more goodies. Pudgy stayed right in the middle of everyone. FRANKENSTEIN had been pretty scary and Pudgy was as jumpy as a cat. The popcorn and the Bighunk candy bar soon took his mind off the Frankenstein Monster, and he was soon his old self, throwing popcorn in the girls' hair and flipping the seats up as other kids tried to sit down.
The music stopped and the lights finally went down as the second feature, THE WEREWOLF, started. It was the scariest thing Pudgy had ever seen in his whole life. He thought he was going to die right in his seat. Lon Chaney jumped from the cliff into the dark, foreboding ocean rather than turn into the werewolf and bite his beautiful girlfriend in the neck. He survived the jump and crawled out of the stormy ocean up the jagged, slippery rocks into a dark, deep cave in the side of the cliff. As the ocean surf wildly pounded at the entrance of the dark cave, he began to turn into the fiendish werewolf. He had been bitten by a wild animal while hunting in the woods, and for some strange reason, known only to the Gypsies, this made him turn into a bloody, crazed werewolf every time the full moon came.
As Lon Chaney's face began to get hairy and his teeth grew into to long ugly fangs, Pudgy began to scream uncontrollably. When Pudgy broke out in the screaming, Tubo and Wee Willie jumped so high that theyfell clear out of their seats. Booper bolted from his seat and ran for the aisle screaming bloody murder. He trampled Bunky, Skinney, and Booper before he fell flat on his face rolling under the girl's seat in front of where he had fallen. People all around them began to scream and run as the panic spread like wild fire. The werewolf, Lon Chaney, began to snarl, scream and howl as the theater lights came up and the film abruptly stopped. After a few minutes everybody had calmed back down, and the film resumed with the werewolf back snarling, foaming at the mouth and biting everybody he could find in the neck, except his sweetheart, of course.
When the WEREWOLF ended, the entire Black Cat Club was scared to death, but Pudgy was almost uncontrollable. He made Tubo and Buger Red stand on each side of him and escort him out of the theater. As they walked outside, the horror of horrors confronted them. It was almost dark and even worse a big, full, orange, harvest, werewolf moon was rising on the horizon. It was ten whole blocks home and Pudgy just knew that the werewolf was out there somewhere just waiting for him! Pudgy made a beeline for the pay phone, but the line was a mile long as every kid in the theater, it seemed, was waiting to beg their mom to come and get them. Pudgy wanted to get in that line so bad it hurt, but he knew he couldn't unless one of the other Black Catters did first and none was that chicken.
As the Black Catters put on their roller skates, the silence was ominous as they all looked towards the horizon and the rising, full moon. They hustled down Kinsley Avenue as fast as they could with only the clickety-clack of their skates resounding and ecoing in the erie, evening stillness. As they approached this side of the hill where the old haunted house was located, they moved to the far side of the street. As they topped the hill, they could see the moon through the trees, bigger and more frightening than ever now. A wolf, really a stray dog somewhere, howled in the distance. They moved even faster! As they topped the hill and looked down the sloping avenue, they were terrified by what they saw. A city street crew had come in and had torn up the sidewalk on the side of the street that they were on--the far side from the old haunted house. This meant that they would have to pass right at the edge of the old haunted house on the only sidewalk available.
Tubo, without missing a beat, yelled back to the others with what seemed genuine fear in his voice, "OK you guys, let's hit it hard and fast and get out of here!" They scooted across the street, and picked up as much additional down-hill speed as possible before passing by the old house. Pudgy was trying his best to keep Collie Dog or anyone else for that matter, between him and the haunted house. Just as they streaked by the front gate, now laying broken on its side in decay, Pudgy's skate wheel caught in a big crack in the sidewalk. He was hurled headlong through the front gate opening into the sinister bushes and shrubs right at the front of the crumbing, old, brick porch. As he hit, the world seemed to go mad as a million or so vampire bats, really they were sparrows that were roosting there for the night, screeched and flew in a thousand different directions. Pudgy screamed at the top of his lungs, "Help, please help me! It's the werewolf! It's the werewolf! Oh, please help me! He's got me! He's got me!"
This only made the rest of the Black Catters panic even more and down the hill they went leaving Pudgy far behind hoping that the werewolf would spend enough time on Pudgy that he couldn't catch up with them. Pudgy scrambled to his feet and hightailed it out of there falling flat on his face and once on his back before getting completely moving down the hi ll again on his steely roller skates. The rest of the Black Catters were over a block ahead of him now. He knew he would never catch them. The hair was standing straight up on the back of his neck as he could feel the hot breath of the werewolf right on his heels. He wanted to close his eyes he was so scared. But he couldn't do that because he knew what it was like from past experience to run into a telephone pole on roller skates.
After what seemed to be an eternity, (about 7 minutes) Pudgy zipped through his front gate and right into his house with his skates on. This was a "No No" at Pudgy's house, but his mind was only on that werewolf monster who was right behind him all of the way home. He locked the front door as quickly as he could. Lucky for him, his Mom was on the back porch doing the laundry. He quickly took out his key and undid the skates. He walked into the front room where his two older sisters were listening to Tarzan of the Apes on the radio. He peeked out the front window curtains and then walked right over and sat down next to his oldest sister, Marsha. Everyone in the family always called her "Sis" because when Pudgy was a baby he had always called her Sis and the name had just stuck.
Sis moved over just a little to give Pudgy a little more room. He moved right along with her now almost sitting right on her lap. She scooted over a little again and Pudgy stayed right with her. Finally, she said, "Pudgy, what in the world is the matter with you?" Pudgy tried to answer, but he was so scared he couldn't even talk. He shocked himself and both of his sisters when he began to cry. Sis put her arm around her little brother and said, "Pudgy, what's wrong with you?" His other sister, Amber, who they called "Bones" because she used to suck on bones from the table when she was a baby, went out to the back porch and told Pudgy's Mom that he was acting strangely. By the time they returned, he had gained his composure somewhat and had stopped crying, but now he was shaking like a leaf.
His Mom took him by the hand and led him into her bedroom for a little talk. They were in there for a long time, and both of the girls wondered what was going on. When they finally came out, Pudgy seemed to be his old self, as he stuck his tongue out at both of them. His Mom said that everything was OK now, but that Pudgy would be sleeping with Sis in the girls' bedroom for a little while instead of in his own room. Pudgy was surprised because Sis didn't protest at all. She seemed to understand without even being told what had happened to him.
At eight o-clock Pudgy's Dad told all of the kids to get their pajamas on and to come for family prayer. One by one the girls came into the front room in their pajamas. Their parents were sitting on the couch listening to Guy Lumbardo and his orchestra play on the radio. A few more minutes passed and Pudgy still didn't come. Finally, Pudgy's Dad went looking for him. Pudgy had crawled into his parent's bed fully clothed. His Dad rousted him out and asked him what he was doing. Finally, the truth came out that he was afraid to go into his own bedroom to get his pajamas out of his drawer. His bedroom window was right over the entrance of their unfinished basement. He had always suspected that a monster must come there at night and now after seeing the WEREWOLF and FRANKENSTEIN, he knew that it was true. His Dad got his pajamas, dressed him, gave him a big hug and said, "Come on son, let's go have family prayer now. That will make you feel better."
After prayer everybody kissed each other good night. Pudgy seemed to be a lot more affectionate than usual. He usually protested when he had to kiss his sisters good night, but not tonight. He hopped into Sis's bed first and scooted right over next to the wall. The werewolf would have to get Sis first before it got to him. She climbed into bed behind him suspecting nothing and said, "Pudgy, are you OK now?" He responded, "Sure Sis, I'm fine. Thanks for letting me sleep with you."
He turned over towards the wall and noticed the moving shadows caused by the big, Elm tree limbs outside moving back and forth in the wind. The blowing wind made a scary whining sound. Even worse than this was the big, orange full moon hanging right over the window now. A dark cloud passed over the face of the moon as he heard the blood curdling howl of a werewolf. (Actually, it was his little dog Boots barking at a cat in their backyard.) He slid down deeper into the bed and pulled the covers up higher placing the sheet right under his little nose. This always made him feel better, and he liked the clean smell of the sheets. As he continued to peer out the window, he noticed wolfbay (it was really honeysuckle) growing up the edge of the window. The old gypsy in the movie had said that wolfbay was a clear sign of the werewolf.
He knelt up in the bed and said the best prayer he had ever said in his life. When he was through, he thought that he felt better. However, as he lay back down, an awful reality hit him like a bolt of lightening. Maybe his sister, maybe Sis herself was a werewolf and was going to bite him in the neck as he slept. After all, she had been in the forest many times with their family cutting firewood for their fireplace. Sis was laying with her back to him sound asleep. He slowly reached over and felt her fingernails to see if they were growing into horrible werewolf claws. They were OK. He then felt her cheeks to see if they were getting hairy. They weren't. He had tried everything except the one, last, true, gypsy test. He slowly moved his pudgy, little hand from her cheek to her mouth. Poochies! Her mouth was closed! He bravely continued, slowly wiggling his fat, little forefinger through her lips and onto one of her eye teeth fully expecting to feel a long, ugly, werewolf fang. It was OK, she wasn't a werewolf!
Just then Sis began to spit and sputter. She sat up in bed and exclaimed, "Pudgy, you nutty, little runt! What are you doing with your finger in my mouth?" Pudgy had jumped so badly that he started to cry again. Sis took piety on the poor, little munchkin and held him close to her for a minute. Pudgy finally confessed what was wrong with him -- the movie, Frankenstein, the werewolf, the old haunted house and the whole works. Sis said it was alright that she understood and Pudgy soon calmed down again.
Just before dropping off to sleep as Pudgy snuggled up to his big sister, he asked her if it was alright if he felt her fingernails, cheeks and eyeteeth every time there was a full moon--just in case. She giggled and said, "Sure it's OK Pudgy. You're my little brother." Pudgy finally dropped off to sleep, but only after he had sworn Sis to absolute secrecy. If the Black Catters ever found out he was sleeping with his big sister, he would never live it down--never! He hoped that Sis would never break her promise and squeal on him. She had sworn by repeating their most serious oath, "Cross my heart and hope to die. Stick a needle in my eye, if I ever, ever tell a lie!"
Pudgy slept with Sis for the next six months and with every full moon she patiently let him check her out. She never became a werewolf and even better yet, she never squealed on him to the Black Catters.

For as long as Pudgy would live, he would never forget the WEREWOLF and FRANKENSTEIN. On dark, windy nights when the full moon rises, even today Grandpa Pudgy still sometimes wonders about the "Legend of the Werewolf"!

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Paratroopers -

By Richard Logan Brimhall

Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
As the Saturday morning Black Cat Club meeting came to a close, Pudgy had a brainstorm that everyone thought was marvelous. Pudgy told all of the Black Catters that they were selling surplus parachutes for .25 cents each out at the airport. These parachutes had been left over from the previous hard winter, when the government had dropped hay and food onto the Indian reservation during one of the big snowstorms. Pudgy said he would be the first Black Catter to jump off from a house and to gently float down to the ground--just like in the movies.
All of the boys immediately headed for Buger Red's house, as he could usually talk his Mom into anything, and they needed a ride to the airport. A few minutes later they were all in the back of Buger Red's Dad's brand new 1955 F200 Ford pickup on their way to buy the wonderful parachutes. Pudgy was so excited he kept jumping up and down in the back of the pickup making it role from side to side. Tubo kept yelling at him to sit down and finally tackled him, almost making the truck run off from the road as Tubo's and Pudgy's weight sunk the bed on driver's side .
At the airport each Black Catter put his twenty-five cents on the counter and was given an army-green canister containing a beautiful, white, silk/nylon, 20 foot across, monstrous parachute. Pudgy popped his out of the canister and strung it out on the runway to get a good look at it. It was marvelous. He squealed with delight as he rolled himself up in the soft, smooth material and the thin, long, white ropes.
Everybody finally piled back into the pickup and they headed back to town. All the way home Pudgy and Booper horsed around threatening to pop one of the chutes out of the back of the pickup to see if it would stop the pickup. After Buger Red's mom yelled at them twice to "put those things back in the cans" they finally started on something else. Theyhad to figure out how they could strap the canisters on their backs for the great jump. They finally decided that they could tie loops of rope around the top and the bottom of the canister and then to these loops, they would tie shoulder straps from the top to the bottom, just like their Boy Scout back packs. As they road along, Booper promised Pudgy that when it was time for Pudgy to jump he would pull the top of the canister off which was tied to the top of the parachute. Booper would hold this until the chute was completely extended, which should be just as Pudgy would leap off from the end of a house. Wee Willie told them that they were both nuts. He said that the chute wouldn't even have time to open before Pudgy hit the ground. Pudgy and Booper told him to shut up his big yap and called him "a big chicken" and "a yellow coward".
Buger Red's house was chosen as the jumping tower. After Buger Red's Mom had gone inside, everyone climbed up the big, old Elm tree at the far end of the house and climbed over onto the roof. Only Pudgy and Booper had put on their parachutes, as Wee Willie had convinced all of the other Black Catters to wait and see what happened to Pudgy and Booper first. Pudgy walked bravely to the highest point of the house over looking the smooth concrete driveway some 16 feet below and yelled, "This is it you guys. I'll float to the ground like a feather. I am a hero! We are going to show all of you big chickens how it's done!! Right Booper?" Booper, who weighed twice as much as Pudgy and wasn't even as tall, jumped up and down squealing with excitement. Rez and Bunky stepped forward and begged Pudgy not to jump, but Pudgy just called them "big, fat, YELLOW chickens".
Pudgy told everyone to stand back as he and Booper gallantly paraded back to the far end of the roof by the big Elm tree. Pudgy and Booper began to yell and scream at the top of their lungs as they started running like two, little, mad demons back down the ridgeback of the roof. Roly poly Booper could hardly keep up as he held the top of the canister that was tied to Pudgy's shoulders and back. "Here we go! Here we go into the wild blue yonder--Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo!" screamed Pudgy.
Pudgy went streaking off from the apex of the roof with all the grace of a ballerina hippopotamus. Booper barely managed to pull the top off from the canister without going over the edge himself (way too late). The rest of the Black Catters came thundering down the roof to the edge to see what was going to be the fate of this mighty hero.
There was a sickening thud, with accompanying screams of pain and anguish as Pudgy's chubby, little, Bee Eye body hit the concrete. No one could see anything but the parachute, as it had completely covered him. Buger Red's Mom came running out of the house to see what the thundering herd of elephants on her roof was all about--not to mention the blood curdling screams of agony coming from the driveway. She quickly pulled the parachute off from the wiggling form, and there lay Pudgy with not just one, but both of his arms broken. A single gasp of horror seemed to come from the 11 other Black Catter as they stared down from their perch on the edge of the roof. Buger Red's Mom yelled at them to get down from there as she ran into the house to call for help.
Pudgy had both of his arms in casts for the next three months. His Mom and Dad had thought a lot about how to punish him, but they finally decided that what had happened to him was punishment enough. The two casts went from his shoulders to his wrists. For Pudgy, the most terrible, humiliating, yucky part about the whole thing was that he had to have his Mom help him when he bathed, ate, and even when he needed to blow his nose. But the very worst of all was when he had to go to the bathroom, since he couldn't reach certain areas of his plump little body without help from his poor Mom.

And what happened to the parachutes? Pudgy had not forgotten about them. He was already planning a new, and wonderful adventure for the Black Catters and the parachutes as soon as he got well, but that's another story.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Sky Diver -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
It was a great day for Pudgy. After three months of itching, not being able to write, having to have someone help him take and bath and even go to the bathroom, the casts were off from his arms. Pudgy was his old self again. He had learned the hard way (from a concrete driveway) that a parachute twenty feet long could not open before hitting the ground when you jumped off from a house only fourteen feet high. Every Black Catter had bought a parachute because Pudgy had convinced them to do so, and now he knew that he had to come up with something good, or else his name was mud. For three months he had been scheming and planning how he could make himself the wonderful, popular Black Catter he had been before he had made such an idiot of himself by jumping off Buger Red's house with a parachute canister tied to his back. As embarrassing as it had all been, he had now decided that it had been worth it, though. Pudgy had come up with the neatest plan he had ever dreamed up in his whole life! The Black Catters would love it!
There was a big vacant lot next to Mr. and Mrs. Lee's home that had the two biggest, tallest Elm trees that Pudgy had ever seen. The very evening, after the doctor cut the casts off from both of his arms, he had climbed up to the top of one of the two giant trees. He lugged up his army-green parachute canister with him and began to figure out how his brilliant idea might work best. After about a half-hour of experimenting, he had it done. At thirty-five feet above the ground, in the very top of one tree, hung a giant twenty-feet across, round hammock--the big, army, freight parachute. Pudgy slid from a tree limb into the marvelous, white, silky feeling hammock and then wiggled to the middle where he could see down to the ground far below through the center hole. He couldn't believe how far down it was! Just looking at it gave him goose bumps and thrilled him at thesame time. This was just great, just great! He couldn't wait until tomorrow, Saturday, to spring this wonderful, new, exciting idea at the Black Cat Club meeting.
The next day, Pudgy waited until the last part of the meeting to unveil his wonderful discovery. Everyone was really excited. None of the Black Catters knew what to do with their parachutes, and this really sounded good. They all left the Black Cat Club House on a dead run for the big Elm trees. Tubo couldn't believe his eyes when he spotted the gigantic parachute stretched out high in the treetop. Rez and Chino were up the tree like greased lightning, and the other ten boys were right behind them.
It was incredible, all twelve Black Catters fit into Pudgy's chute with plenty of room to romp and play at their hearts content. The nylon was so smooth, silky and strong. The chute was divided into may sections like a pie by strong nylon ropes. You could get into a section and slide from the top of it down towards the hole in the center. The only problem was that the center hole was about three feet across, and if you didn't stop in time, it was a long, long way down. It started to rain a little bit, and this just made the sliding all the better as the chute surface became slicker and slicker.
Everyone ran for home to get their own parachute canisters. What a blast! As each Black Catter arrived, the others helped him put up his chute stretching the ropes as tightly as possible. The rain continued and the trees and the chutes just kept getting slicker and slicker. The giant Elm trees finally had 12 of the giant chutes decorating their lofty branches like huge, white flowers. Little munchkin Black Catters jumped from chute to chute and from limb to limb like a pack of howling monkeys in a Tarzan movie. There was no doubt about it! This was the greatest idea Pudgy Perkins had ever had in his whole life--all eight years of it.
Chino was the first Black Catter to have it dawn on him just how dangerous things were getting--especially the danger the center hole of each chute posed. Some of the chutes were positioned as low as twenty feet and others as high as forty-five. Chino made his way over to where Tubo was bouncing on a tiny limb like a large gorilla. After talking for a minute, Tubo sounded the Black Cat Cry, three loud meows or shrieks, and everyone hustled over to the chute in which he and Chino had settled. Tubo said that they had to stop playing until they got some ropes to weave across all of the center holes. There was a big moan and then grumbling because it might stop raining at any minute. Tubo, the Black Cat Club President, insisted and most of the Black Catters begin shimmying down the tree.
All of a sudden Pudgy leaped from the chute into the next chute, about four feet below, yelling as he went, "You big, fat chicken Tubo! Watch this." As he landed on the upper edge of the chute, he had more speed and momentum than he realized. The water from the rain was pouring out of the center hole in torrents, and that's right where Pudgy went--right with it. His scream was audible all the way down, "Oh Nooooooooooooooooooooo! Not agaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnn!!!"
The impact was horrible. The sound was like a giant, flat rock splatting on the surface of a river thrown from high above. The impact threw mud and water up at least five-hundred feet into the air--well, maybe ten feet anyway. Nobody could see him. Finally Booper yelled that he thought he saw a big blob of mud moving around at the base of the tree. Rez was down in a flash just as Pudgy surfaced from the mud crater screaming and wailing to the top of his lungs. At first no one could understand what he was yelling, but finally they it come through, " No! No! I did it again! I did it again! I broke both of my arms! I broke both of my arms again!"
So it was back to the hospital and back to the same doctor who had taken the casts off from Pudgy's arms just yesterday. Back to the humiliation and torture of being in casts for at least three more months again. And worst of all, he would have to admit to his buddies how dumb, dumb, dumb he had been--and for the second time!
Everybody really felt sorry for Pudgy, and so they met ten minutes early before Pudgy got to the Black Cat Club House the following Saturday morning to plan something special for Pudgy. The meeting turned out to be a signing party with every one of the Black Catters signing Pudgy's casts and writing something nice about him. As Pudgy left the club house that day he decided that he was his old wonderful, handsome, intelligent, lovable self again and was already planning their next caper.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Fire Paintings -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Clause and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white tee shirt, black and white high-top tennis shoes and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that his kid was a little mover and shaker.
One of Pudgy's buddies was a kid named Jack Jennings. He was red headed like Pudgy and was about a year younger. Like Pudgy, Jack had always wanted to be a member of the Black Cat Club. He, however, was too young still, since the eligible age was a minimum of eight years old.
Pudgy told Jack all of the neat things that they did in the Club giving blow by blow descriptions of everything except the secret codes, cat calls and handshakes, of course.
Jack lived right next door to the Black Cat Club House. In fact, his garage was just a stones throw away from the club house itself. Jack's Dad was a railroader like everyone else's dad. However, his Mom was quite special in that she taught piano and was a wonderful artist painting a great deal in oils. He had done hundreds of beautiful oil paintings of all kinds. The favorite reoccurring theme in her work seemed to be scenes of the Navajo, Hopi and Pueblo Indians who's reservations were near by.
Late one Saturday afternoon Pudgy was fooling around in his bedroom with his electric train. He had had a full day starting the morning with the Black Cat Club meeting, then they had all roller skated to the Rialto Theater for the Saturday Afternoon Matinee. It had been a neat Tarzan double feature with a new Sky King serial and the comedies had really been good too. He heard a tapping on his back window. He looked out and there was his buddy Jack. He opened the back door and Jack came sneaking into the room with a big, wide grin on his face. Pudgy said, "What's with you?" It was then that Jack pulled them out from under his coat. It was a whole carton of Camel cigarettes. Pudgy squealed, "You did it, you really did it! You got so many -- a whole carton! Your Dad will find out, won't he?" Jack was as proud of himself as could be. Pudgy had been trying to get him to be brave enough to sneak one or two packs from his dad's supply for over a year, but a whole carton! Jack explained that his dad had bought a whole year's supply of cigarettes and the he wouldn't miss just on carton. Jack's dad was a chain smoker, as were many of the railroaders. Jack's Dad always bought his cigarettes by the carton and Pudgy figured that he probably wouldn't miss a pack or two. Besides, it would be Jack who would get the whipping, if anyone ever found out.

They had talked about this for a long time. Neither of them had ever been able to even get close to their dad's cigarettes. Their dads told them what a filthy, terrible habit smoking was and that they should never, never smoke. The two little runts hustled out the back door, down the alley past the Black Cat Club, over Jack's back yard fence and into the rear door the garage. This is where they had planned on doing it -- smoking that first, wonderful, cool cigarette. The garage had an odor of turpentine, canvas and paints, as this is where Jack's Mother stored all of her finished paintings and her supplies. There must have been several hundred paintings in the garage. Pudgy marveled at how beautiful they were even in the subdued light of the garage.

They sat down in the middle of the garage floor. Jack carefully removed a pack of Camels from the carton and opened it with the red string that ran around the top of the pack. He clumsily pulled one out and started to fumble around with it. Pudgy grabbed it from him and said, "Let me show you how to do it -- like Humphry Bogart does it in the movies." He took the cigarette and tapped the front end of it on the heal of his shoe. Pudgy explained, "This packs the tobacco to the tip of the cigarette and makes it easier to light and makes it smoke and taste better." He then stuck it into his mouth, hanging it out of the right corner dangling it daringly from his lower lip. He then looked at Jack and while wiggling his eyebrows up and down said, "Hey buddy, got a light?" Jack started giggling first. Pudgy almost sucked the cigarette right down his throat and the giggling got worse. Pudgy was laughing so hard that he fell on the floor and knocked something over without either of them noticing it. It was a can of turpentine.

When they finally got control of themselves, they each sat down facing each other on the floor with a Camel hanging out of the right side of their mouths. Pudgy struck the match and they both quickly leaned forward to light up while the flame was high. They jumped back almost as fast as both boys had burned off their eyelashes. The match went out and Pudgy threw it over his shoulder just like his heros always did in the movies. He lite another match and they both leaned forward more cautiously this time to light up. They both took a long, deep drag and that's when the coughing started. The color in their faces changed from a rosy pink to a dull, sick grey. Pretty soon they were both gagging like a couple of sick dogs. It was only then that Pudgy realized that there was a lot more smoke in the garage than just the cigarettes smoke.

There was a full-blown fire raging right behind them! They made a bee-line for the front door. As they came banging out of the garage, there was Jack's Mom walking towards them with a newly finished painting in her hands;. Pudgy fessed up right away pointing at John and blurting out, "He did it! He stole the cigarettes!". By then the smoke was billowing out of the open door and the jig was up. Pudgy hi-tailed it over the fence and down the alley.

The fire engines came, but the garage burned to the ground and almost even set the Black Club House on fire. Mrs. Jennings managed to save a few paintings which she eventually gave to Buger Red and to some of the other Black Catters because they were smoke damaged.

And what happened to Pudgy and his Buddy? Well, they learned the hard way not to play with matches or cigarettes. They swore on a stack of Bibles to never, never again mess with matches -- except, of course, to prematurely light off the city fireworks on the Forth of July, to light candles for light in their underground tunnel forts, to set the oil ditch on fire by the railroad yard, to burn the mountains of Christmas trees they collected for the giant bonfire after Christmas each year, to burn sulfur for their stink bombs to drive the people from the church house, the school and the theater, and so on. However, these are stories yet to be told.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Stink Bomb Kid -
By Richard L. Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus, and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennis shoes and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
It was almost ten o'clock and Pudgy hustled out of his back gate and across the alley to the marvelous Black Cat Clubhouse. He approached the door of the wonderful clubhouse, an old chicken coop. He gave the secret knock, rat-a-tat-tat-tat--tat-tat, on the rump of the black cat painted on the old wooden door. Someone inside of the mysterious building returned the secret knock and Pudgy screeched the three Black Cat Club Meows. The door finally creaked open and he rushed inside. Ten of his twelve buddies, the Black Catters, were already there. Tubo, the president, stood to begin the meeting indicating that Booper wouldn't make it today as his Mom had grounded him for putting a water snake down his little sister's back. The business of the meeting was conducted, which included among other things: Finishing up some of the foxholes in Mrs. Manker's vacant lot; Making sure that Nacho got all of their dues (.25 cents a week each for the past three months) to buy firecrackers and cherry bombs for everyone next week when he went to Mexico to visit his grandparents; The repairs assigned out that needed to be done on the tree fort at Mr. Lee's house; A new spit-wad launcher was assigned to Buger Red to try out on his teacher, Miss Anderson, at school; And other numerous items of importance- too many to mention. As the meeting was coming to a close, everyone was anticipating the activity as Pudgy was in charge of this area and his activities were never dull. Tubo finally turned the meeting over to Pudgy.
Pudgy could hardly contain himself. He blurted out, "I've found the coolest thing I have ever seen in my life, and you guys are going to love it! He quickly pulled a funny, crumbly looking yellow rock out of his pocket and held it up for all to see. "What is it?" said Bunky. "I don't know what they call it", Pudgy said, "but I sure know what it does! It makes the world's greatest stick bombs! "Really? Show us Pudgy!" all of the Black Catters seemed to cry in unison. "What does the stink bomb smell like?" asked Rez. "It smells like the rottenest eggs you have ever smelled in your life. The smell will curl your hair its so bad!" Pudgy replied. Bee Eye took the strange, crumbly, yellow-looking rock form Pudgy's hand and smelled it. "I don't smell anything!" he exclaimed. Pudgy grabbed it back and said, "Just you watch!" He grabbed an old, empty jelly bottle in the corner they had kept polliwogs in, took off the lid and kelt down on the floor. He took a book of matches that had The Prairie Moon Cafe written across the top and fired one up. Everyone gathered around as he held the yellow rock into the flame of the match. The strangest thing the Black Catters had ever seen happened. The bottom side of the rock began to burn with an odd bluish-purple flame. As it burned little drops of liquid fire began to drop into the old jelly jar. After a few seconds almost the whole rock was aglow with the strange purple fire and Pudgy quickly let it drop into the jar and put the lid on tightly. The doors and windows of the Black Club were opened in a hurry as the boys got their first whiff of this stinky stuff. What a yucky, gucky smell, and rotten eggs is just what it was like, but even worse. All of the boys continued to watch the bottle as the strange rock seemed to melt into a bright, purple, fiery liquid in the bottom of the jelly jar. The bottle filled with a thick, dark smoke. Pudgy grabbed the bottle, held it high in the air with has right hand and yelled, "Black Catters, the world nastiest stink bomb!" "What do we do with it now Pudgy?" asked Collie Dog. "We take it to the Tarzan Movie with us this afternoon to see how well it works," exclaimed Pudgy. Everybody yelled, "Hurrah!" They all put on their steel-wheeled roller stakes and headed for the Rialto Theater for the their weekly Saturday afternoon matinee.
They all paid their dime to get in at the box office. Pudgy was the last one into the theater with the jelly bottle hidden under his jacket next to the skin of his fat, little belly. All the Black Catters went right down to the front of the theater and sat in their favorite place in the middle of the front row. The Daffy Duck comedy, the Sky King serial and the first feature (Tarzan in the Hidden Valley) were great. However, the second movie was as anticipated - boring. A few minutes into the second movie, Pudgy nudged Buger Red's elbow and said, "I'll open the bottle in one minute. Pass it along." One minute later the Black Catters all got up and headed for the door. As they approached the exit they began to hear, "Who did it? Who cut a rusty? Get him out of here!" They were almost immediately followed by several hundred other little kids coughing and crying as they clamored to get out of the theater. It was pandemonium! The lights came up as the smarty, teen-aged ushers ran for the exists or any other way out that they could find. As everyone was milling around outside trying to figure out what had happened, the Black Catters faded away down the alley behind the theater.
They skated back to the Black Cat Club House for a pow-wow as this yellow stuff was strong medicine. The first thing the Black Catters wanted to know was where had Pudgy gotten the mysterious yellow, purple burning, stinky, stinky rock. He marched right out into the alley behind the club house and started digging in the dirt. A few inches under the red, clay surface he suddenly hit bright yellow. Unknown to the boys, their club house was sitting right on top of a small sulfur deposit. The other boys jumped down on all fours and soon they were jabbing and poking at the yellow stuff with sticks and pocket knives. They filled almost half of a sack in just a few minutes. What a discovery this was!
Everybody hightailed it home and back as fast as their little legs would carry them. They brought back more empty jelly jars or their Mom's Ball canning jars. Soon the Black Cat Club House was a buzzing stink bomb factory. They soon had about twenty stink bombs and some very interesting wounds from the hot, burning sulfur. Wee Willie had made the mistake of letting one of the fiery, little, purple, liquid drops fall on to his left wrist. He had jumped around yelling and screaming and had finally stuck his whole arm in a barrel of water before the fire-filled hole in the top of his wrist seemed to subside. This was bad stuff if it got on to you and most Black Catters learned the lesson the hard way. It would burn clear through the skin and deep into the muscle, and almost nothing could put it out. Just about every Black Catter today still carries scars from sulfur burns which they brag about to their kids and grandkids.
They decided that tomorrow at Sunday School, they would run another test, but this time using several bombs instead of just one. The speaker at Sunday School was going to be Mr. Wilson-- the most boring guy in the neighborhood. Well, Sunday morning was a complete success. After Mr. Wilson had just got really wound up with his preaching, the entire teary eyed, coughing congregation was driven from the chapel into the street. All of the Church meetings for the rest of the day were canceled--even the evening meeting. As the boys milled around outside the Church trying to look as innocent as possible and trying not to laugh, Pudgy stepped forth and proposed the greatest plan he had ever devised. Monday they were all going to have to take the most hated exam of elementary school--The National Achievement Test.
The next morning Pudgy had the Black Catters organized into a first class hit squad. Jefferson Elementary was a single-story, block-long school with classrooms on both sides of the central hallway. Most of the Black Catters were in grades 3-5 , which left the two first grade rooms, two second grade rooms and the two sixth grade rooms without someone to set off the bombs. Friends were recruited in each room with the promise of consideration of being able to join the Black Cat Club. At 9:05 am. the pledge of allegiance was broadcast over the intercom which all of the kids repeated, hands dutifully on their little hearts. Then the kids of Jefferson Elementary School sat down to the torture of tortures--The National Achievement Test. Each teacher took out a stop watch, rattled off the instructions driving profound fear into each and every rapidly beating little heart, and then said, "Pick up your pencils ------ GO!" Pudgy looked over at Chino and started giggling. Mrs. Olsen scolded Pudgy and said that if he didn't get with it that she would personally skin him alive. The remainder of the 6.5 minutes ticked by and Mrs. Olsen, as well as every other teacher in the school finally ordered, "Stop, Put down your pencils and turn your exam face down on the desk." At that moment, Pudgy and the assigned kid in every other class raised their hand and ask if he or she could hurry to the bathroom before the next part of the test started. Twelve kids hit the hallway doors removing the jelly jar stink bombs from their coats. Each stink bomb was put into a trash can in the hall nearest their home-room door, the lid opened and the kids returned to the classrooms. Needless to say, the National Achievement Test was never finished that day. In fact school was dismissed for the rest of the day as the entire city police force and the fire department came to save the school.
By 9:30 all of the Black Catters had made it to the club house, and they were back at it in the alley digging up more of the wonderful yellow stuff. At about 9:40 the Fire Chief's bright red Ford pickup truck pulled into the alley from one end and one of the two town police cars came in from the other end. The jig was up!
The Black Catters and their accomplices, all 18 of them, had to stay after school for the next two weeks. The punishments at home were equally hard, but the worst thing of all was that the Rialto Theater banned the Black Catters from the Saturday afternoon matinee for the next month, which, of course, was not the case with Sunday School.
During that fateful first week, a crew came from the city and dug up all of the sulfur deposit in the alley and hauled the wonderful yellow stuff away. They thought that they got it all, but not before Pudgy had stowed some away under the board floor of the Black Cat Club House for another day and another time. The Stink-bomb Kid would ride again!

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- Pantsed and Hanged -

By Richard L. Brimhall

Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
For some time now, something had been happening to Pudgy that he didn't quite understand. He had always known, ever since he could remember, that girls were yucky - especially his sisters. But lately something very weird had been happening to him. He was starting to like girls a little bit--especially Buger Red's little sister, Marsha and also Betty, who was Tubo and Wee Willie's little sister. But when he tried to talk to them, they would tell him to leave them alone. They walked home from school together everyday, so Pudgy started following them so that he could talk to them. They just told him to get away, and so the inevitable happened. He started throwing rocks at them. They chased him and, of course, he got away. Pudgy thought that this was really pretty neat, and so he the threw rocks at them again the next afternoon and sure enough, they chased him again.
The next morning during afternoon recess, Wee Willie and Buger Red nailed Pudgy and warned him to leave their sisters alone, or else! These guys were his best buddies, fellow Black Catters, but they just didn't understand true love yet. Pudgy responded with, "Or else what?" " Or else we are going to pants you!" they yelled. Pudgy quickly responded as he retreated into his classroom door, "Yeah, you and what army!"
Well that afternoon he did it again, and this time his aim wasn't so good and he accidently hit Betty in the head with a big clod. It was more fun than ever though as the girls chased him all the harder, but he still managed to get away. "One of these days I will let them catch me just to see how much they really love me," he thought.
After he got his garbages dumped for his Mom, Pudgy went out in the back alley to dig and try to find some sulfur to make more stink bombs. He was on his knees digging when all of a sudden Wee Willie and Buger Red pounced on him. He kicked and squealed, but it didn't do him any good. Within a matter of seconds his pants were gone, and they didn't stop there. They stripped all of his clothes off except his shorts and his beanie cap with the spinner on the top. They dragged him out of the alley kicking and screaming to the telephone pole on the street and strung him up. They tied a rope around his fat, little belly, threw the rope over the top of the telephone pole, and then pulled this little, kicking, squealing blob three-fourths of the way up the pole and then tied the rope off at the bottom.
Wee Willie and Buger Red ran over into the bushes across the street near their fox holes that they had dug with the Black Catters the Saturday before. There they hid and watched. Several cars came by without even noticing Pudgy. He was being very quiet and was trying to grab the pole so that he could get himself down. He finally gave this up and started yelling and screaming for help. It was about then that a police car came by. The officers couldn't believe their eyes. Here, almost at the top of a telephone pole was this pudgy, little, almost naked, red headed kid hanging by a rope kicking and screaming as the spinner on his beanie cap spun in the wind. It took them almost five minutes to stop laughing before they could get the rope undone and lower Pudgy down. As they put him into the car, Wee Willie and Buger Red could hear the policemen asking him who had done this terrible thing to him. Pudgy, blurted out, "No one. I was just climbing the pole and got tangled in my safety rope." One of the cops said, "Sure you did Kid! You must have done something pretty bad for your buddies to have done this to you!" The car moved around the corner to Pudgy's house. Pudgy got out and ran in as fast as he could through the back door into his bedroom. He was safe. His Mom hadn't seen him from the kitchen window where she was fixing dinner.

As Pudgy got out a clean pair of Levis, he decided that love really wasn't all it was cracked up to be, and that maybe it could wait a few more years since he was only eight years old.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Cisco Kid -

By Richard L. Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a litt le runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus, and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Pudgy's family had Cisco for many years. In fact, Pudgy couldn't even remember life without Cisco. Cisco was now in his twilight years and TLC (tender loving care) was the order of the day. Pudgy knew that any mistreatment of Cisco would bring his mother to say, "You little runt Pudgy. If you do that again to Cisco, I'll box you ears off!" Pudgy had heaped years of both love and abuse on poor old Cisco.. Old Cisco had slept somewhere in Pudgy's bed almost every night for as long as eight year old Pudgy Perkins could remember. Cisco was really getting gross these past few years as all old Chihuahua dogs always do. He was passing gas, burping, stinking, shedding a lot of hair and all that goes with getting old. The only thing Pudgy minded was the hair all over his room and especially in his bed. However, passing gas, swallowing air and belching were Pudgy's favorite pastimes and he knew he was sure a lot better at it than Old Cisco. Sometimes it was almost as if he and Old Cisco were in competition to see who could let the loudest, stinkiest "rusty" or the longest, biggest, grossest belch. The best part about cutting "rusties" was when Pudgy's sisters were present. The would scream and try to kick Pudgy and old Cisco and hold their noses. Pudgy and Cisco loved every minute of it, and kept it up as long as they could.
Now Old Cisco was Pudgy's Mom's favorite of all of the children, it seemed. She had spoiled him even more rotten than she had spoiled Pudgy. Cisco had his own doggie bowl, he had his own doggie door in the bottom of the kitchen door, he had his own doggie walking sweater and when Pudgy's Dad was gone on a trip on the Santa Fe Railroad, she usually let Cisco sleep with her at the bottom of her bed. Cisco ate steaks everyday it seemed, but Pudgy didn't mind, as he had been known to cook himself up a few when his Mom wasn't looking.
Each year Pudgy's family had a gigantic family reunion in the White Mountains at their family ranch called the P23, which was named for Pudgy's Dad's 13 brothers and sisters (PERKINS23). The second weekend of August of every year, all the Perkins family gathered at their beloved ranch for good food, the best company in the world (each other), rodeos, races, dances, and all kinds of wonderful things. Old Cisco seemed to go crazy once he got on the ranch. Even though he wasn't much bigger than an over-grown mouse, he chased squirrels, rabbits, frogs, lizards, and the coyotes mostly chased him. For the week of the reunion he lived high, wide and handsome--free as a bird in the beautiful Ponderosa pine forest. He, of course, never got too far away from the cabin, as he had to scarf his three, juicy, delicious steaks every day.
Now the Perkins Family were peculiar people in some ways. One of their peculiarities was the way they called their kids to eat and especially at the ranch. The ranch was about 70 acres in size and the 400-plus Perkins kids spread out all over it. Each of the thirteen Perkins families had a special way of calling their kids to eat. Some whistled, some yelled and other methods ranged from a cow bell to beating a metal triangle. Now Pudgy's aunt from his Mom's side, who was not a Perkins, happened to be at the ranch with them this one particular time. Pudgy's mom asked her to call the kids to lunch. Pudgy's aunt was a feisty, little, barrel chested woman. She had an unusual voice that could jump up at least two octaves higher than any other human being ever born. She walked out of the cabin onto the front porch, almost stepping on old Cisco who was all tuckered out from chasing varmints all morning. He was dead asleep. She raised both hand to her mouth and let rip the most blood-curdling yell ever made or heard by man or beast. It echoed the length and breadth of the ranch. The short powerful burst of sound hit sleeping Old Cisco like a ton of bricks.
He jumped straight up into the air almost to eye-level with Pudgy's aunt. As he hit the ground he bounced once, ran around in two circles, fell over, quivered two or three times, stretched out his stubby, little, skinny legs to full length and then didn't move a muscle. He was deader than a doornail--a heart attack someone said.
The funeral was held at sunset that very evening. Pudgy dug the shallow grave just behind the cabin. Pudgy's aunt felt so bad that she left the Ranch and went home before the funeral. Old Cisco was buried with full honors with several hundred of the Perkins clan gathered around.
The next time the family visited the ranch and the grave, old Cisco had his left, front fore leg sticking right up out of the grave as if to say, "Look out for that yell!" Many years have come and gone since old Cisco checked out at the P23 Ranch, but to this very day Pudgy and every one of the Perkins kids, some now grandparents themselves, still use their aunty's call when it's time to come and eat. And so far, no one else has been killed by it, and it still hasn't raised old Cisco from the grave. As Pudgy has returned again and again to the ranch over all of these years, he has never forgotten this experience. As the coyotes howl and growl far out west, Pudgy always remembers the Cisco Kid, Old Cisco, and how his old chow-hound buddy bit the dust those many years ago.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- Pudgy Goes to the Big City -

By Richard L. Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T- shirt, black and white high-top tennis shoes and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that his kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Pudgy had gone to scouts that evening, and it ended up that his Mother and some other mothers had finagled the Girl Scouts into showing up at the same time. Now, there was definitely a method in their madness. The mothers wanted to make sure their grubby, little boys got some manners and civilization into their lives. The scheme was to teach the boys a dance, and thus, to get them to learn how to treat girls as young ladies. Pudgy resisted, but his mother threatened to skin him alive on the spot, and so he reluctantly stumbled around the floor with Ima Rose. This simple dance practice soon led to others, and then a plan to travel to the big city to participate with other scouts in a dance festival. Pudgy and the other Black Catters, who were also Boy Scouts were really excited about the trip, and finally deemed the torture of dancing with yucky, little girls worth the trip.
The Saturday before the last dance practice and the trip, all of the Black Catters met at the Black Cat Club House for their regular weekly meeting. Plans were made to stash stink bombs, water balloons, firecrackers, cherry bombs, and other necessary items for a good time on the trip. The boys were riding in the back of Buger Red's Dad's new, F200 Ford pickup. Buger Red's Dad had made a plywood cover for the back, and had put a mattress in it just for the trip. The boys would stash all of their goodies and other important items under the mattress. The girls were to ride, of course, with some of the mothers in the cars. Tubo told the boys that he was going to bring some cards and teach all the Black Catters how to play poker. None of the boys really knew what poker was, except that the cowboys always played this game in the movies.
The long-awaited day finally arrived. Pudgy had tossed and turned all night long hardly sleeping a wink he was so excited. At 6:00 a.m. he was at Buger Red's house loudly claiming his choice spot near the stink bombs, which he would protect with his very life. The twelve boys barely fit in the truck, but they hardly noticed how crowded it was as it hummed down the highway. The big city was a ten hour drive, and none of the boys had ever been to a big city. The excitement ran high.

They had been traveling about 15 minutes when Tubo pulled out the cards, and the education in the game of poker began. It took about 10 minutes for Tubo to get everybody familiar enough with the game, and then he introduced how the cowboys in the movies always bet money and then the excitement really started. Every Black Catter had raided his piggy bank, saved part of his allowance and begged every dime he could from his parents for the trip. In other words, they were all loaded. Buger Red had managed to put together fifteen dollars, and he thought that he was filthy rich, and he let everyone know it. It wasn't long before each Black Catter had his money out and dreams of getting rich off from the other "suckers" was paramount in each and every mind. It only took about thirty minutes for Tubo to clean out Buger Red, Pudgy, Wee Willie, Bunky, Booper, Collie Dog and Rez. Only Chino, Nacho, Bee Eye and Skinney still had some of their money left and it was going fast. Tubo had coins and dollar bills flowing over his pants and shirt pockets. He was on a roll and was higher than a kite, laughing and giggling uncontrollably as he sometimes slobbered on the cards as he was dealing.
Just then there was a loud "boom, bank, flap, flap, flap" and the pickup pitched to the side of the road coming to an abrupt stop throwing the boys on top of each other and money and cards everywhere. Before the boys knew what had happened, the back door of the plywood cover was opened and Buger Red's Dad was asking, "Are you boys alright? We blew a tire! " Tubo lunged backwards trying to hide some of the cards and money under his big,fat bottom, but it was too late. A long lecture followed about the evils of poker and gambling, and everyone had to give every dime they had won back. The lesson was learned, the cards were confiscated and Tubo was no longer the rich man he had been.
About four hours into the trip, they arrived at a marvelous place called Navajo Bridge. This narrow, steel bridge spanned the mighty Colorado River which roared and seethed as its frothy, brown, silt-laden water careened down the rock gorge far, far below. Buger Red's Dad stopped as soon as they got across the bridge and told all of the boys to find the biggest, flattest, sandstone rock they could carry and to follow him. They carefully walked out to the middle of the bridge and looked down, down, down to the river far below. Buger Red's Dad took his big, flat rock and hurled it off from the side of the bridge in a spinning horizontal motion so that it fell like a giant, flat, spinning saucer. All of the boys watched as it seemed to float slowly down, down, down the wall of the deep, red, sandstone gorge. When it finally hit the water, they could see it break into a million pieces and then a second or so later they heard the echoing sound of what seemed to be an explosion of dynamite. Each boy in turn launched his flat, rock saucer into the void. The explosions echoed up and down the deep canyon for what seemed to be a half hour before all of the flat stones had joined the raging waters of the Colorado River. What a neat, fewy-cool adventure!
By nightfall they had arrived at the biggest town the boys had ever seen. They couldn't believe that it took almost a half hour to get to the hotel after they had entered the big city. The houses and buildings seemed to go on forever, and the big, big buildings called skyscrapers were like mountains. They had seen these in the Rialto Theater Saturday Afternoon Matinee serials of Super Man. He was always leaping giant buildings in a single bound, and here they really were. When they pulled up to their hotel they could hardly believe what they saw. It was gigantic -- over ten stories tall. It had a cafe, a shoe shine shop, a magazine store and a huge parking lot. It was almost as big as their whole town.
When they got through signing the big red book with the man at the counter, he gave them keys to their rooms, and they got on the elevator. They had never been on an elevator before and the next hour was spent riding it up and down, up and down, until a man came and ran them off. Their rooms were all together along the front side of the hotel on the tenth floor overlooking the street below. They could see forever from their windows. It was like being on top of a high mountain. The boys were soon unpacked. They carefully hid their firecrackers, cherry bombs, stink bombs and other important things under their beds.
As soon as they were settled in, they all got back on the elevator and went down stairs to the cafe to eat. This was really exciting as none of the Black Catters had ever eaten in a real cafe before. Most of them ordered hamburgers, french fries and malts. They had been lectured about minding their manners when they ate out and about always saying "yes mama" and "no mama" to the waitress. They filled up two booths and carefully watched how the other people in the other booths did things. Something they could never figure out was that when these people got up to go pay their bills at the cash register, they left money lying around on the table. Why would anyone just leave their money on the table and walk out? It wasn't long before the Black Catters came to the conclusion that city people were just plain crazy! They all got up and started raking the money off from the tables into their hands and putting it into their pockets. It wasn't long before the waitress came out of the kitchen carrying a big platter full of hamburgers. She squealed as she saw Bunky raking the coins from the last table. The other Black Catters were counting their money and congratulating each other when the waitress began to scream at them all. "I'm calling the cops on you guys! You little thieves!" She burst out the side door, and it wasn't five seconds before a big, burley policeman was standing over the confused Black Catters. "This lady tells me that you boys are stealing her tips," the officer said. Pudgy piped up, "We have not! What's tips anyway?" Bunky said, "This money is ours! Finders keepers losers weepers! Those crazy people just left it laying around on the tables and walked off". The policeman and the waitress looked at each other in disbelief and broke into laughter. The Black Catters then got a lecture in big city ways, which meant that not only did they have to give all of the money to the waitress, but they had to leave her a "tip" on the table too every time they ate in the cafe ­10% of what the food cost.
The dance festival was a big success. Pudgy only tromped on Ima Rose's feet twice and Buger Red only missed Virginia once, when she fell on her face as they executed the latin, under arm spin. They all got to go to the zoo, then swim in the hot water mineral baths, and to do and see lots of other neat things. Fire crackers and cherry bombs thrown on innocent passers-by every night, and the water balloons clobbered every car in the parking lots incessantly for the three days they were there. The stink bombs were ceremoniously released at the main air in-take shaft of the ventilating system as they left the hotel and all its occupants in a tizzy!
As the Black Catters finally returned home with their exhausted parent-chaperons, it was unanimous that dancing with the girls was worth the trip to the big city, and they hoped that they could do it again some time.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- Halloween Mischief -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Saturday morning at 10:00 a.m. all of the Black Catters gathered in the Black Cat Club House for their weekly meeting. This was a special meeting as Halloween was Monday night and special plans had to be made. The objectives of Halloween for the Black Catters was the same as always ­ get as many sacks of goodies from tricK-or-treating as humanly possible and trick as many people as possible on this special night for mischief Since Pudgy was the activity chairman, he took over the latter part of the meeting to propose the plan of attack for Halloween Night. They were all to meet just before Sundown at the club house, each bringing two of the largest sacks they could find. The objective was to fill two sacks each with goodies, hitting as many houses as possible in the first two hours. The last two hours were to be spent having fun ­ playing tricks on people. Pudgy reminded the Black Catters that each one needed to bring a bar of soap, two cardboard boxes, paper bags, a roll of kite string, and Rez was given the special assignment of bringing a bag of fresh cow pies, since his Dad had cattle. Everyone then put on their steel wheeled roller skates and headed off for the Rialto Theater for the Saturday Afternoon Matinee. This week a new Sky King Serial started as Lash Laru had finally been killed by Apaches after 21 weekly half-hour thrillers. The double feature was going to be "Tom Mix Meets BIlly the Kid" and "Roy Rogers and the New Mexico Kid". Pudgy hoped the comedies would include a Mighty Mouse or Porky Pig!
After Church Sunday morning each and every boy began working on his Halloween costume. Pudgy was going to be a vampire. He had his wax fangs, his black cape, his sister's eye shadow, a bottle of tomato sauce, an old used candle and matches from his Mom's kitchen, which he had borrowed without telling her of course. Tubo was going to be Frankenstein, Booper­the Mummy, Rez-Geronimo, Skinney­Jack in the Beanstalk, Bee Eye­a ghost, Wee Willie­the mad butcher, Buger Red­Superman, Chino­the Werewolf, Bunky­Jack the Ripper and so on. By Sunday evening each and every Black Catter had his costume ready and had gathered all of the other required items, including a candle and matches.


Monday morning at school the time just seemed to crawl by. After lunch the school Halloween party was held and Pudgy won the prize for the best costume in his bloody, tomato sauce Dracula outfit. By the time the party was over it seemed that Pudgy had squirted tomato sauce on every little girl in the school. He especially liked Buger Red's sister, Sis, and she seemed to have more sauce on her than any other girl in the school ­ a sign of Pudgy's affection.
It wasn't long after school let out that the sun started to fade into the west. The little ghouls and goblins soon began to appear on the streets scurrying from door to door, socking away the goodies in their brown paper sacks. The Black Catters had met just before sundown, and they were now working the neighborhood house by house like a mechanized group of army ants. By the end of the second hour, about 8:00 o'clock, everyone had both bags filled, they had identified their targets for mischief and were back at the Black Cat Club house giggling and stuffing their faces with goodies. The first target was the Petermann house as Ole' Man Petermann had only given them one malted milk ball each. What a scrooge! First the boys went around the house and soaped (made marks on) all of the windows with their bars of soap. Then a paper sack was opened and a fresh, gooey cow pie was carefully placed at the bottom of the sack. Pudgy then placed the sack on the porch right in front of the front door of the house. Collie Dog next lit the sack with his Dad's cigarette lighter. It burst into flames immediately. Pudgy pounded on the door and then he and Collie Dog hightailed it into the bushes where the rest of the guys were hidden. As Mr. Petermann opened the front door, he held a big bowl of candy in both hands. His eyes bugged out as he proceeded to stomp and stomp on the sack jumping around to avoid the fire, splattering the cow manure all over his pants, shoes, the porch and front door. The boys tried, but they couldn't hold it and rolls of laughter rang out in the crisp night air. Their hiding place was quickly abandoned as they ran down the alle y laughing and yelling as Mr. Petermann screamed a string of his foulest obscenities. This same procedure was followed at six more houses in the neighborhood before the cow pies ran out. It was time for something new.
In their neighborhood there was a narrow street where most of the people always drove too fast. There were big trees on both sides of the street and lots of bushes where the Black Catters could hide. The boys went to work quickly stringing kite string back and forth across the street using the tree trunks to wrap it back and forth. Soon they had a virtual spider web of string from street level up to about five feet high strung in between the many trees on both sides of the road. They were almost finished when Bunky came running around the corner yelling that a car was coming. Everyone dove for the bushes just as the car came careening around the corner. As the car cleared the corner the driver gunned it for all it was worth just before he saw the maze in his headlights of what appeared to him as wire strung across the roadway. Just as he hit the first strings he slammed on the brakes. As the tires screeched leaving long black marks on the pavements, the car began to turn sideways. By the time it came to a stop, it had passed through all of the string barriers and had spun around 180 degrees sitting backwards in the road. The driver leaped wildly out of his car. He looked at his car and then ran back and grabbed some of the broken strings. He started screaming a few choice words, but finally realized that on this dark night with his car setting backwards in the middle of the road, he could never find who had done this. He got in his car and sped off burning rubber as he went through the first two gears.


Next the Black Catters brought out all of their cardboard boxes. They found a few more behind the Triangle Grocery Store. They then returned to the same road where they had previously strung the string. This time the boys built a six-foot-high box wall all the way across the road. The boxes were empty, but the next guy to come around the corner wouldn't know that. It wasn't long before Booper came bouncing around the corner yelling, "One's coming, one's coming! Hide, hide!" He rolled into the bushes just as the car turned the corner. Before the driver could brake, he was well into the cardboard box wall. Boxes went everywhere as the boys heard the tires squeal as the brakes locked the wheels and the car went into a slide. As the boys peeked up from the bushes, they saw a flashing, red light come on and the voice blared out over a speaker, "This is the County Sheriff. You boys stay where you are!" All of the Black Caters jumped over Mrs. Hipco's front fence, ran down the side of her house tromping the life our of her flower garden, through the back yard and into the back alley. They could hear the car turning around and its engine revving as the sheriff gave pursuit. As soon as they got half way down the alley they jumped Mr. Tanner's back fence, ran through his front yard, crossed the same street the Boxes were on and ran into the vacant lot by Mrs. Manker's house. Before you could say lickety split they were all safely underground in the maze of tunnels and underground forts the Black Catters had been digging for years. The sheriff continued to cruise the neighborhood looking for the them, but the boys stayed put for another half hour. They simply lit their candles, talked and gobbled Halloween candy.
At about 10:30 they crawled out of the underground forts and headed for home. As Pudgy walked in the front door, his mother was waiting for him. His Dracula outfit was filthy dirty with tons of red dirt stuck to the blood-tomato sauce he had poured all over himself. She knew where he had been and even suspected what he had been up to, even though to this very day she doesn't know everything. She made Pudgy sit in the corner, " Until you tell me every single thing!", but how could Dracula squeal on his buddies. Calls were made, mothers talked and every Black Catter was grounded for the entire week. The punishment was horrible! They got no allowance, which meant they got no Saturday Afternoon Matinee Movie, no popcorn, candy, rootbeer, strawberry pop or cream soda. For Pudgy it was really tough as it meant he didn't get his weekly, super, duper milkshake as Annie's Grocery store. Their Moms even took all of their Halloween goodies away and made them dance a half hour longer with the yuckie girls at the Girl Scout dance practice! Did Pudgy ever talk? No sir-ree! At least, not until now.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Railroad Kid -

By Richard Logan Brimhall



Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus, and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous--he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
As the weekly Saturday morning meeting of the Black Cat Club ended, every kid was so jealous of Pudgy that they could hardly stand it. Pudgy had announced that he was going on a "trip" with his Dad. Now, going on a "trip" had very special meaning for the Black Catters as most of their fathers worked for the Santa Fe Railroad, as did Pudgy's Dad. Going on a "trip" meant that Pudgy's Dad was going to take him on his next railroad trip to Seligman, Arizona. It meant that Pudgy would get to not only board the giant diesel engines, as most of the boys had done with their Dads for a few minutes, but that he would also get to ride in the cab of the train for several hundred miles, stay overnight on the other end, eat out in a cafe, see where his Dad lived when he was away from home, and most of all, it was almost a sure thing that he would get to sit on his Dad's lap and drive the giant train! Every Black Catter had begged and begged his Dad to let him go on one of his trips with him, but Pudgy was the first to finally make that dream a reality.
Pudgy's Dad was a "Hoghead" (an engineer or the individual who operated or drove the train). The train engine crew consisted of the Hoghead, the Fireman (assistant to the Hoghead and in charge of keeping the giant diesel motors running properly), and a "Brakie" (the Brakeman in charge of all switching, throwing the switches to move the train off from the main track to another track). The Conductor and two more Brakeman finished off the train crew. They were located in the caboose at the rear of the train. Their job was to protect the rear of the train, the train cargo, and to watch for and repair any boxcar axles (journal boxes) that might catch on fire during the trip. Every job was important to the safety of the train. If for example, the Brakie didn't catch an axle fire in time, the axle would be burned or cut in half, drop out from under the boxcar and derail or wreck the entire train.
The Saturday Afternoon Matinee at the Rialto Theater was great. As all of the Black Catters headed home, Pudgy had promised everybody that he would call them the minute his Dad got his "call". A "call" meant that an employee of the railroad, "a callboy," would come to Pudgy's house at any time day or night to let Pudgy's Dad know what time and what train he was called for and when it should leave town. Pudgy and his Dad would then have one hour and a half before they reported at the Crew Dispatcher's Office to sign in and get on their train. Every Black Catter wanted to be there to see Pudgy off.
The call came at 7:30 p. m. Sunday evening. Pudgy called all eleven Black Catters and told them that he would be at the Crew Dispatchers office at 9:00 p. m. to sign in with his Dad for the train, Express Freight 904. When Pudgy and his Dad got to the Crew Dispatcher's Office, all eleven excited boys were there. As Pudgy and his Dad came in, the Crew Dispatcher boomed out from behind the counter, "Mr. Pudgy Perkins, Your crew is signed in and ready to go. Do they look satisfactory to you?" Pudgy looked at his Dad. His father said, "You're the head man on this trip Mr. Perkins. Will these six men do?" Pudgy smiled and said, "You bet! Where do I sign in?" The Crew Dispatcher flipped the log book around as Pudgy's Dad held him up to the counter." Pudgy signed in as "Hoghead" Pudgy Perkins, Express Freight 904 departing at 9:30 p. m.
As his Dad put him down on the floor again, the Conductor walked up to him and handed him a long, white, narrow card. He said, "Hoghead Pudgy, would you please review the cargo manifest and sign it off at the bottom." Pudgy soon realized that he was looking at a list, by number, of all of the freight cars they were hauling. The contents of each car was listed with the corresponding car number. Every single car had something called "ewes" in it. Pudgy looked at his Dad and then at the Conductor and asked, "What are eeeweees?" "The word isn't pronounced like it looks son. It is really pronounced more like "yous," and it means female sheep. We are carrying a load of sheep." Pudgy quickly signed off and returned the card to the Conductor. His Dad took a little railroad hat out of his railroad bag, removed Pudgy's beanie cap and put it on Pudgy's fiery, red hair. It had Head Hoghead written across the front in big, bold letters. The Conductor said, "Hoghead Pudgy, It's time to go."
The Black Catters watched in envy as Pudgy and the six crew members walked over five or six sets of railroad tracks to the waiting Express Freight 904. The train was huge! It had six monstrous engines, a zillion cars and a little red caboose at the very far end. The engine crew climbed aboard, and the boys saw Pudgy sit down at the throttle on his Dad's side. All they could see was the top of his hat at the bottom of the window. After a few minutes, Pudgy's Dad lifted him up and scooted under him into the big, padded, brown seat. Pudgy reached up and gave two long pulls on the rope of the big air horn. The six monstrous engines roared as the train began to stretch out as Pudgy and his Dad pulled back the big hand throttle. The Black Catters waved goodby to Pudgy as the monstrous metal snake begin to slowly slither forward. As each car passed by, the Conductor and the two Brakeman who were on the ground by the side of the train examined the axles on each and every one. When the caboose finally approached, the train was moving fast enough that they had to run along side, throw their railroad bags on the rear platform, and then jump aboard swinging up to the caboose platform using the hand rail.
The train was more wonderful than Pudgy could have ever imagined. The lead engine had three seats in it that were brown leather, swiveled around, and had big arm rests--one on each side and one in the middle. The cab had special, big, long mirrors on each side of the engine that they could watch the rest of the train from while going around curves. It had a five gallon bottle of water atop their very own drinking fountain. The heater was warm and powerful, and the Hoghead had his own radio that he used to communicate with the caboose and the towns. They even had their very own bathroom right in the nose of the cab.
As they moved across the prairie lands, the huge train screamed along at almost 70 miles per hour. When they climbed into the mountains, it slowed down because of its tremendous weight. As they left the mountains the same weight pushed them forward faster and faster until Pudgy's Dad showed him how to use the "dynamic brakes" (a reversing of the big electric traction motors) which slowed them down to a safer speed. Once in a while when even the traction motors were not enough to keep the train's downward speed in check, Pudgy's Dad would "apply some air" (use the trains air braking system). As they approached automobile crossings, Pudgy would lay onto the big air horn warning any cars long before the train arrived at the crossing. Because of their speed and weight, it would be impossible to stop the train if a car was on the tracks. Probably the strangest thing in the cab for Pudgy was the "Dead Man's Pedal." This was a big, silver pedal that the Hoghead always had to keep his right foot on and depressed to the floor or the train would go into "Big-hole" (an emergency stop in which the air brakes on each and every car the length of the train would lock tight). If this type of emergency stop took place, the metal wheels of many of the cars would lock, slide on the steel rails and be ground flat on one edge. "Bighole" was only used if a collision with another train was about to happen. Thus, one of the reasons for the name "Dead Man's Pedal" . The design of the spring-loaded "Dead Man's Pedal" was such that if the Hoghead became ill or went to sleep while operating the train, that his foot would slide off, and an emergency stop would be initiated. This had saved several trains and crews in the past when the Hoghead had a heart attack while operating the train. This was the second reason for the name "Dead Man's Pedal". Pudgy's legs were way too short to reach the "Dead Man's Pedal", so his Dad held it down for him.
As they were coming down the mountain, the whine of the dynamic brakes was like music to Pudgy ears. The faster they went the higher pitched and louder the whine. He loved to look back on the curves in the darkness as his Dad applied the air brakes and see the fire and sparks shooting out from underneath the steel wheels. It was normal to see fire and sparks at night during air braking, as the brake shoes and the wheels were both made of steel. However, on one such occasion after his Dad released the air brakes, Pudgy noticed that the fifth car back from the last engine still had fire and smoke shooting out from under one of the wheels. His Dad radioed the Conductor back in the Caboose and asked him to confirm the fire and smoke on the next curve. The Conductor's voice crackled back over the radio, "Yep, it looks like we've got a hot box. Let's get this train stopped before we loose it! Tell Hoghead Pudgy good work!" The train was brought to a halt. The Conductor and one brakeman made their way up to the fifth car while the engine brakeman went out ahead of t he train to set warning fusees (flares) and the caboose brakeman did the same at the rear of the train. In this way any approaching train would have warning to stop before colliding with them, as they were stopped on the "main line" (main track). The Conductor and the brakeman put out the fire and made the necessary repairs in about 30 minutes, and then they were on their way again.
The sun finally rose behind the train as they headed into the railroad yard at Seligman. Pudgy couldn't believe what happened next. Instead of stopping like he thought they would, his Dad explained to him that they would simply slow down to 520 miles per hour, and then they would jump off from the moving train. Pudgy was cautioned to jump away from the train so that he could not fall back into the wheel of the train, in case he slipped. Pudgy's Dad would be the last man to jump from the engine ladder as he had to stay on-board until the new Hoghead had jumped on-board to take over the train. It happened just like his Dad had said. When they got almost to the Crew Dispatcher's Office, his Dad threw open the steel door and down the ladder went the brakeman and the fireman. Pudgy shinnied down the steel ladder right behind them. Both the brakeman and the fireman made successful jumps running to keep from falling over, and then it was Pudgy's turn. His Dad told him to hurry as they were approaching the place where the new Hoghead was standing getting ready to run and jump onto the ladder. Pudgy quickly moved to the bottom of the ladder, closed his eyes, leaned out as far away from the rolling train wheels as possible and jumped. When he hit the ground his short little legs seemed to be running a mile a minute to keep him from falling over, but he made it. Just as he stopped he saw the new hoghead now running along side the ladder. He grasped hold, swung his foot up to the first rung of the ladder and shinnied all the way up it with the grace of a climbing monkey. He disappeared through the open door and within seconds his Dad was out, down, and walking back towards him. Pudgy watched the other two new crew members run for the ladder and climb aboard. The rest of the new crew waited in the pale morning light for the caboose to come up and the same process was repeated.
Pudgy's crew signed in at the Crew Dispatcher's counter at 7:00 a.m. He noticed that there was a place to put where you were going to be staying, and that his Dad had written "The Shack" so Pudgy wrote the same thing. He wondered what "The Shack" was like. It didn't sound very good to him. As Pudgy and his Dad walked down the alley towards "The Shack," he was dead tired. They arrived in about five minutes and "The Shack" wasn't bad. In fact, it was pretty nice. It had two large bedrooms on each end with a kitchen and a bathroom in the middle. Each bedroom had 3 beds, a radio and bookshelves. By his Dad's bed, he noticed pictures of his Mom and his sisters. There was even a picture of Pudgy in his last year's Halloween outfit--Count Dracula with red blood (ketchup) dripping from his wax fangs. The wax fangs were great because they were sweet and Pudgy always chewed them up the morning after Halloween. Pudgy was so tired that his Dad just pointed to the bed next to his and Pudgy dropped to his knees for a quick prayer before climbing in. His Dad pulled the shades, and as soon as Pudgy was under the covers, he was out like a light.
About eight hours later Pudgy woke up to the smell of bacon and eggs cooking. He got out of bed and walked into the kitchen and there was his Dad all shaven and dressed in his railroad coveralls. They had a great, big breakfast, and then Pudgy was off with his Dad to check the "board"(a big blackboard used at the crew dispatcher's office that listed the trains and the crew being assigned to each.). From the looks of the board, they wouldn't get their call until later that evening sometime.
The rest of the day was spent seeing the community of Seligman, where Pudgy's Dad lived almost half of his life while away from home working on the railroad. At noon they ate in one of the town's two cafes, which was a real treat for Pudgy, as the only other time he had eaten in a cafe was on a trip with his parents to Salt Lake City. He remembered how the last time he was in a cafe he had gotten into trouble for taking the tips off from the table when people left. He really hadn't known what a tip was, but this time he did, and he noticed that his Dad left one for the waitress. The flapjacks with Aunt Jamima's Log Cabin Syrup and lots of butter were really good! His Dad showed him the hills where he sometimes went deer hunting and where the railroaders passed the time playing pool while waiting for their trains. He almost beat his Dad at a game of snooker--his first time to ever play the game. He only lost because he had to stand on a stool to reach over the table. There was also a little church where his Dad attended when he was there on Sundays. He found that his Dad mostly read while he was in Seligman. There were all kinds of books at the shack. His Dad's favorites were Zane Grey, the Readers Digest and church books and magazines.
The Call Boy came to the shack about 7:00 p.m. and told them that they were called for 8:30 p.m. for Freight 302. Pudgy's Dad had made a comment when they were looking at the board that he hoped that they didn't get this train as it was extra heavy because it was carrying coal. After signing out, their crew was standing outside by the "main line" (the main track in the railroad yard) as the big freight train headlight came over the horizon from California. Pudgy knew that he was going to have the run and jump on the ladder of the moving engine just like the other crew had done when they had arrived. As the big headlight got closer and closer he began to wonder if his stubby little legs could run fast enough to make it. The train was almost to them when all of a sudden his Dad scooped Pudgy up and began running along side of it as the crew aboard the train began jumping off. Pudgy reached for the ladder and shinnied right up it into the cab. An old, grey-haired hoghead was standing there holding his bag. He said to Pudgy, "Hoghead Pudgy, this train is running fine. Be careful on the down-hill grades though, as you need to apply at least 50 pounds of extra air along with full dynamic brakes. This is one heavy Jose! Now, stand right here and put your foot on this dead man pedal. Have a good trip son!" and then he was gone through the open door. Pudgy was alone in the cab of the moving freight train, and it scared him, especially the part of holding the dead man's pedal down. His Dad came through the door in a couple of seconds, and he felt better immediately. His Dad asked, "Pudgy, did that hoghead have any instructions about this train?" and Pudgy repeated them to his Dad.
One by one the crew hopped aboard. As Pudgy's Dad sat down, he stepped on the dead man pedal, and Pudgy jumped up into his lap, pulled hard twice on the air horn rope and then brought the big metal arm of the throttle all the way back. The engines roared, the smoke billowed and Freight 305 began to slowly pick up speed as it moved down the silver rails shining brightly in the evening moonlight. The climb over the mountain was very long and slow. The engines barely had enough power to pull the heavy load of coal up the steep grade. It wasn't boring though for Pudgy, as it was a beautiful moonlit night, and his Dad pointed out all of the wild game of the forest. He saw lots of deer, rabbits, some elk, a couple of raccoons, a porcupine and even a bear in the beam of the giant headlight.
They topped over the summit about 1:00 a.m. and the heavy train began to pick up more and more speed. The dynamic brakes were at full power and more and more air was being applied to the brakes the length of the train. Pudgy made sure that his Dad was handling this part, as he was worried about what the other Hoghead had said. He soon began to feel comfortable again as he saw just how well his Dad knew how to handle the train and apply just the right amount of air to the braking system. "My Dad is really something!" he thought.
As they came off from the mountain, the curves yielded to long straight runs of glistening steel rails, and they picked up speed again. This is when it happened. All of a sudden Pudgy's Dad yelled, "Hit the deck! Animal collision! Animal collision!" It scared the pants off Pudgy! His Dad grabbed him and fell to the floor of the cab next to the brakeman who had already beat them there. He noticed that his Dad's hand was holding the dead man's pedal down now. There were many, many thuds, groans and odd cries in the next few seconds. As Pudgy looked up he could see dark object flying over the top and sides of the big engine cab. It seemed to be over in a matter of seconds. As Pudgy's Dad lifted him up, he could hardly believe what he was seeing. All of the windows were covered with a dark, thick, gooey liquid with chunks of stuff here and there. One of the front windows had been shattered, but the glass had not fallen through. There was a horrible smell too. The train hadn't even slowed down a bit. "What happened Dad? What happened?" Pudgy cried. "We just went through a herd of mules that were on the tracks and from the looks of it, we killed at least twenty or thirty of the poor buggers," Pudgy's Dad replied. The first engine seemed to be completely covered with the blood, the guts and fecal matter (manure) of the animals. After looking a second time, Pudgy noticed that the broken window had what appeared to be, the bloody front leg from one of the animals stuck right through it.
The Fireman went back to the other engines to check things out almost immediately. Pudgy's Dad radioed back to the crew in the caboose, and they were not even aware that it had happened, as the big train hadn't slowed down a bit. The fireman soon returned and pronounced the train undamaged, but said he didn't want to go back there again as all of the blood and guts made him sick. Within an hour they pulled into the main yard at home and just after they got off from the train, the "car toads" (the car maintenance men) went to work with big fire hoses washing the first several engines and replacing the broken window.
At the next Black Cat Club meeting Pudgy told all. The Black Catters listened in delight as Pudgy described every detail of his wonderful trip--especially the gory part about hitting the mules. No one really believed that Pudgy had been the Hoghead and had really driven the train, but at least some of it was true. Over the next few years many other Black Catters got to go on one trip with their Dads. This practice was against railroad rules, but everyone looked the other way it seemed for one father-son trip of a lifetime. Many of the Black Catters later became railroaders.
Pudgy Perkins did not become a railroader, but he would remember this experience all of his life. Everytime he would read or hear about a train colliding with a car or with people, he knew, oh, so well how horrible such an event really was.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Seagull Bomber's Revenge -


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Pudgy had been bragging for months to the other guys at the Black Cat Club that he was going to fabulous Southern California, San Diego, to go deep-sea fishing in a boat on the Pacific Ocean with his Dad. He had never been on the ocean before, and had only seen it once in his whole life­all eight years of it. All of the Black Catters were so jealous they could hardly stand it, especially since Pudgy would not only get to go deep sea fishing with his Dad, but he got to go to Tijuana, Mexico as well. Mexico, for them, was piggy-heaven, fireworks. Everyone brought out their life savings the Saturday before Pudgy left. As he left the Black Cat Club House he had more money than he had seen in his whole life. He was to buy everything from the little lady finger firecrackers to the monstrous M80's that could blow your whole arm off­at least that's what Bunky said.
The train-ride with his Mom, Dad, and sisters was really exciting. His Dad got a free pass for the whole family since he was a Santa Fe Railway Engineer. They even got births (beds to sleep in at night). Pudgy especially liked the diner car where he must have eaten at least ten times during the twelve hour trip. The vista-cruise-liner car was really neat too! It was like sitting on top of a B-29 bomber in the glass turret bubble. He could see all the way down the top of the train from the engine to the caboose. At night the stars shone in the dark like he had never seen them before, except maybe for a couple of times on scouts hikes or hunting trips with his Dad. They got on at 8:00 p.m. and were in San Diego at the same time the next morning.
His Aunt Ann and Uncle Casey and their kids were at the station to pick them up in their neat stationwagon. It was so exciting to smell, feel and finally see the ocean and the beaches as they traveled to his Aunt Ann's neat house. It was just on the edge of a canyon that was full of ponds, big banana plants, and lots of bamboo. It was just like in the Tarzan movies­ a jungle! It was full of water snakes, frogs, polywogs and crawdads (crayfish). Something Pudgy was really looking forward to was television. His Aunt Ann had television, and he had never seen it before. It was love at first sight, and he almost didn't move from the set for the first two days. His Aunt Ann treated him like a king bringing his meals too him as he sat in Uncle Casey's big, leather lounge chair. Inbetween meals, she brought him big, tall glasses of fresh pineapple juice with lots of ice, alternated occasionally with yummy Hawaiian punch instead.

The second night his Mom made him go to bed at 10 o'clock which he resisted vigorously, but to no avail as they were going to Mexico in the morning. Tijuana was great. Pudgy and his cousin, Clark, had their pictures taken on a real zebra (a gray donkey painted with stripes). They bought genuine Lash Laruoo Bullwhips that had snappers on the end that popped just like a pistol shot. They also each got cool switchblades, but they both fell apart the next day. The neatest thing they got, though, was fireworks­all kinds of fireworks. So many that they could hardly carry them back to the car. Then came the problem of hiding them to get them across the border. They just knew that if they got caught that they would have to go to jail for the rest of their lives, but the risk was worth it! They had a little of everything available, but something that Pudgy had never seen was called a Cherry Bomb. It was a red, round thing with a green, slick fuse. The entire Cherry Bomb was about the size of a large marble. The crossing of the boarder went without a hitch and Pudgy told Clark that it was because he (Pudgy) was so good looking and had such an innocent face. They got home just in time to see Tarzan followed by Dragnet before their mothers ran them off to bed in the back bedroom. Tomorrow was another big day. They were going deep sea fishing with their Dads and Pudgy had told all of the Black Catters that he would bring them back a shark.
The next morning started at 3:00 a.m. Breakfast was over by four and by five-thirty they were boarding their boat down at the San Diego Marina. It was about thirty feet long and had a square, funny looking tank towards the back with a lid on it. Pudgy found out that the tank was full of live fish that were going to be used for bait. The boat had a cabin and a higher place above that was where the captain stood at the wheel as the boat left the harbor and headed out to sea. There were about fifteen other people on the boat. Pudgy couldn't believe how big the fishing poles, reels and hooks were. They were really going to get some monsters! The bait fish were almost as big as the trout he was used to catching in the mountains back home.
About a half an hour out, the Captain and some of the other crew-members started setting up the poles for them. They would take the big hooks and jam them into the mouths of the poor bait fish. They then gave each of them a pole as they let the baited hook, with the wiggling fish on it, drop into the water as the line was released. Pudgy's Dad and some of the other men were given a funny looking thing that they put around their waists. It was a big. wide, leather belt with a round leather cylinder in the front that they put the end of the pole down into. The captain told everyone that when a really big one hit the line, that they should sit down in one of the three funny looking chairs at the back of the boat. One of the crew members would strap them into the chair with a seat belt and with the end of the pole stuck in the front of the big leather belt, they could not be pulled overboard by a really big fish.
It wasn't long before the line of his Dad's big pole began to sing and zing. It was a strike and it looked like a big one. His Dad was in the chair like a flash as the big, long pole almost bent into under the weight of the monster on the other end of the line. It took about forty-five minutes of the hardest work Pudgy had ever seen his Dad do before the giant fish (the captain called it an albacore) floated near the surface still fighting weakly. As Pudgy's Dad pulled it nearer and nearer to the boat, the captain reached out into the water with a long pole with an big, ugly hook on the end (a gaff hook). He plunged the hook into the back of the big fish and blood spurted everywhere as the sea turned red with froth and foam created by the wildly struggling albacore. The captain pulled with all of his might and another crewman rammed the hook of another gaff into the back of the albacore. Finally they were able to haul the albacore ( a huge fish) onto the deck. It was beautiful and so, so big that little Pudgy could hardly believe his eyes!
For the next six to seven hours they continued to fish bringing in smaller ones, but Pudgy's Dad's was the biggest. The more fish they caught, the more blood there was in the water and on the deck of the boat. The crew kept throwing buckets of water onto the deck of the boat to wash the blood through the holes at the bottom of the railing and back into the sea.
After about the third fish was caught, they started to come and there were lots of them. Their big triangular fins jutted out of the water as they circled the boat looking for something to gash with their rows and rows of razor sharp teeth. "Sharks, Sharks", yelled the captain. Pudgy couldn't believe how big and mean the sharks looked. They had cold, black, beady eyes that seemed to say, "Just fall in the water little boy, and we will have you for dinner!" Soon the sharks were taking the bait on the lines and swollowing the big hooks. They were reeled in and as soon as the captain sunk the big gaff hook into their gills he would pull their ugly heads above the water just long enough for a crewman to shoot them in the head with a 12 gauge shotgun. More blood would splatter everywhere and all the more sharks would come. Pudgy begged the captain to get him a shark to take home to the Black Catters, but the captain explained that he would never bring a shark on-board as they could stay alive for hours. It was too dangerous!
About halfway into the day Pudgy suddenly began to feel funny. His fat little belly began to make him feel like it was turning around in circles inside of him. His Dad had told him about getting seasick, but he knew he was too tough for such sissy stuff. His Dad had taken some kind of stuff called Dramamine so he wouldn't get sick, but Pudgy had refused. As the boat rolled in the waves, and he saw more and more blood, he kept getting sicker and sicker. His cousin Clark also kind of looked peaked to Pudgy. Clark was at the side of the boat with his head hung over edge. Then it happened, Clark begin to vomit his guts out, and Pudgy was right behind him. The boat would roll, they would cry, barff, moan, and cry vomit and moan some more. To Pudgy it seemed like they were going to die right there! After what seemed like an eternity, Pudgy stopped vomiting and seemed to feel better and so did Clark. Most of the fisherman had caught all they wanted and the boat was finally headed back up from Mexican waters to San Diego. This is when Pudgy got his bright idea.
He grabbed Clark, and they walked to the back of the boat. All of the people, including Pudgy's Dad, were in the cabin eating and talking or up front watching the dolphins leaping in front of the boat. Pudgy pulled a Cherry Bomb out of his pocket and said to Clark, "Didn't that guy tell us that the fuses on these things would burn under water?" Clark said, "Ya, I think that's what he said. Why?" Pudgy's devious little mind was running mile a minute. He pulled out a book of matches and lit a Cherry Bomb. He quickly dropped it into the water behind the boat. It was only a few seconds when they heard the muffled explosion and saw the little column of water and smoke rise into the air as the bomb blew up. "Wow, Pudgy yelled! That was neat!" Pudgy then marched into the cabin and asked the captain if he could play with the remaining bait fish in the square tank. The captain said that he could, and that he might even want to throw some of them to the many seagulls that were now following right behind the boat. Well, this made things even better than Pudgy could have ever imagined.

Pudgy had had experience with seagulls before. The last time he had been in California visiting his Aunt Ann they had bombed him. He had gone to Sunday School at his Aunt's Church. As they walked out the front door of the church after the meeting was over, a flock of seagulls flying overhead had let loose. There must have been fifty people standing around Pudgy visiting, but Pudgy was the only one that got hit. The white stuff got into his eye, his mouth, on his head, his shoulders and on his pants and shoes. In all he had been hit twelve time and no one standing close to him got one single drop. Clark had laughed so hard at him, Pudgy would never forget what Clark had kept chanting, "Look up, look up into the sky. My oh my, I sure glad that cows don't fly!"
His original plan was to stuff a cherry bomb into the mouth of the bait fish, light the fuse, throw it into the water and watch it swim a little ways before blowing up. He ran back to the back of the boat, grabbed a handful of fish from the tank and threw them into the air. It was amazing, before any of the fish even hit the water the seagulls swooped down and caught them in midair, swallowing them in the blink of an eye. They dye was cast. Revenge would be his! After all, "What comes around goes around!" hadn't someone said. This was going to work like a charm.
Clark held the squirming fish as Pudgy lit and stuffed the Cherry Bomb down its gullet. Pudgy then grabbed the fish and threw it as high into the air as his chubby, little arms could fling it. They both watched in amazement as a big seagull dove and picked off the fish about 10 feet above the water and then began to climb upwards. At about forty feet it happened. By then the seagull had completely swallowed the fish containing the lighted Cherry Bomb. There was a muffled pop, a huge ball of feathers floated towards the sea and it was all over. It was incredible! No one else had even noticed, as they were all looking forward, or eating and talking. Pudgy looked at Clark and started to say something, but Clark turned his head the other way. Pudgy Perkins grabbed his cousin, turned him around and said, "I don't think we ought to do that again! That was horrible!" Clark shook his head up and down in agreement.
Pudgy and Clark made a solemn oath that they would never, never tell anyone of this terrible deed. That pact was kept for more than forty years until the dirty deed was revealed in this story. And still to this day, whenever Pudgy gets near seagulls "What goes around still comes around," as the seagull bombers still seem to find their target no matter how old he gets. Older but wiser, Pudgy has learned to accept his fate gracefully.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- Buger Wall -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Now most people have some habits they like to keep as private as possible and Pudgy Perkins was no exception. No one except his family knew all there was to know about Pudgy Perkins­not even his best buddies, the Black Catters. There was one place in Pudgy's home where he never invited anyone except his dog and this special place was his bedroom. Now Pudgy's bedroom was large, located at the back of his house, and had two big windows that looked out onto his back yard, the alley and the back of Black Cat Club House. Since Pudgy was almost a baby, he had practiced what his mother called "a disgusting habit" in his back bedroom. Pudgy picked his nose. But, of course, many people pick their noses. The "disgusting habit" was that he always did it in bed and was too lazy to dispose of the bugers properly, if he decided not to eat them, which he frequently did. He simply smeared them on the wall by his bed. After eight years of cleaning the dry, yellow, crusted bugers off from his wall, his mother finally refused to do it anymore.
She thought that this tactic would get him to stop. It was a mistake, as now almost a years worth of many layers of thick Pudgy bugers covered the wall by his bed. His big sisters called him a gross little runt and even threatened to tell the Black Catters if he didn't stop this "disgusting habit", but all to no avail. His entire family avoided his piggy room. His sisters even started calling him "Buger Wall" which he hated with a passion.
Now one Saturday morning during the Black Cat Club Meeting Booper,who liked Pudgy's sister Kaye, called Pudgy "Buger Wall". It got everybody's attention right away and it wasn't long until everyone was asking him what it meant. It was obvious that Booper didn't know either, so Pudgy just told everyone that it was a family nick-name and it didn't mean anything at all. The following Saturday was going to be a Scout campout so the boys dropped the "Buger Wall" inquiry and started planning the campout.
This was going to be Pudgy's first Scout campout and he was excited. Friday after school all the Black Catters hustled home and picked up their bedrolls (blankets rolled up in a canvas), their backpacks and headed over to the Church where they were to meet their Scoutmaster with his truck. Excitement ran high as the boys headed out to the mountains. After an hour drive they were deep in the great ponderosa pine forest. They finally wound their way down to Clover Springs and set up camp just before dark. Pudgy and Booper were assigned to a two-man puptent. Pudgy was all thumbs as they tried to put up the puptent, but Booper had done it before so they had it up in no time. The boys cooked dinner and then sat around the campfire telling scary stories until it was time to hit the sack.
Before Pudgy and Booper crawled into their bedrolls, Booper showed Pudgy how to gather pine needles and put them under his bedroll to make it more comfortable. They said their prayers, blew out the candle and were off to sleep -- well not quite. Pudgy tried to resist, but he couldn't and besides it was pitch dark and no one would ever see him. He began picking his nose, eating a few of the salty little critters and putting the rest on the tent just a few inches above his face. Well, after about 15 minutes of this he was too tired to continue and fell asleep.
During the night a gentle rain fell soaking all of the tents. However, the tents would not leak unless you touched the canvas when it was wet. When morning broke, the rain had stopped and all of the boys started breakfast. Pudgy was in charge of breakfast that morning and so he was up before the other boys starting the fire and getting everything ready to cook. As the boys dressed and came to the campfire one by one, Pudgy noticed how weird they were all looking at him. As he was bending over the scrambled eggs, something fell from his face into the frying pan in which he was stirring the eggs. Bee Eye was the first of the Black Catters to finally speak, "Pudgy, What do you have all over your face?" Pudgy reached up and brushed his face with his free hand and a lot more "stuff" fell into the cooking eggs. About then Booper came walking up and asked, "Pudgy, What is all of that gooey stuff on the tent above where you were sleeping? It looks like BUGERS!" Pudgy's night time collection had been so softened by the rain that much of it had slimed off onto his face during the night. Needless to say, none of the boys ate breakfast that morning, as scrambled eggs with Pudgy bugers weren't very popular with the boys.
In spite of what happened no one still connected the name "Buger Wall" with the event until some time later. Booper had come over to play with Pudgy after school and Pudgy had been side tracked on his way home swiping apples from Mr. Evan's tree. Booper knocked on the outside door of his bedroom and no one answered, so he decided to go into Pudgy's room and play with his electric train while he waited. Upon entering the room Booper couldn't help but see it­a whole wall full of bugers just like in the tent except these were dry like to ones that had been on Pudgy's face and had fallen into the eggs. There were bugers of all colors, sizes, textures, and shapes. It was almost like someone had stuccoed Pudgy's wall with them. In fact, Booper thought he could see different shapes and forms - like the Indian head on a nickel. Booper could not believe his eyes! He high-tailed it out of there as fast as he could. Boy, did he have a tale to tell.
Things at the next Saturday Black Club Meeting were really buzzing when Pudgy showed up. When it came time for the activity, which Pudgy was in change of, Tubo didn't turn the time over to him. Instead he announced that the activity would be to go to Pudgy's house and to see his "Buger Wall Collection". Pudgy thought that he was going to die right there, but then Booper said, "This guy has the neatest collection of bugers I have ever seen in my life. It is cool, cool, cool! He even has buger pictures! How did you get your mother to let you keep them on the wall Pudgy?" "Yeah Pudgy, How did you do that?" everyone seemed to cry in unison. Pudgy explained how he was really in charge at his house and not his mother. Bugers on his wall was his way of showing her who was boss!
All of the Black Catters were soon in Pudgy's room admiring his handiwork. This should have been a disaster for Pudgy, but instead it was a triumph. Instead of being called Buger Wall for the rest of his life, he was admired and emulated. There seemed to be a sudden rash of bugers on the walls of all of the Black Catters for the next several months. Mothers began to call Pudgy's Mom and finally Pudgy Perkins was given a scraper. His collection was removed from the wall, along with most of the paint and his Dad (when his Mom brought his Dad into the picture, Pudgy knew that she really meant business) laid down the law.
Pudgy never again put bugers on the wall. The hardest part of breaking this habit was that he was too lazy to get out of bed when he picked his nose. Necessity, however, is the mother of invention so Pudgy just ate them all!

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Hot Rod Kid -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker.
Now one summer sweet, 'ole, little Pudgy Perkin's older cousin came to stay with his family to work on the railroad. He was 18 years old and had just graduated from high school. Pudgy's cousin was from L.A. and was a hotroder. He drove a 1932 Ford Roadster with an AB block Ford flathead V-8 engine. It had orange flames painted on the side, tuck and roll, black naugahide upholstery, dual exhausts, and four two-barrel carburetors. It was so low to the ground that Pudgy's cousin could hop right over the side of it into his seat without even opening the door. It was the greatest thing Pudgy had ever seen. It was fire-engine red with little, tiny front tires and great big, wide back tires. It could peel rubber for half a block. The tires smoked like mad and Pudgy was so smashed back in his seat in that half block that he could hardly breathe. It was wonderful! Pudgy spent that whole summer reading his cousin's hot rod books and waiting for him to come home from work so he could ride in the cool '32 Ford Roadster. The hot rod books were full of all kinds of wonderful pictures of custom, California hot rods and one that Pudgy particularly fell in love with was a stunning customized 1955 Ford F200 pickup. It was the coolest thing he had ever seen anywhere­even cooler than his cousins Roadster.
At the summer's end his cousin left for college having saved enough money to pay for his first two semesters. Pudgy begged him to leave some of the hot rod magazines and especially the one with the customized 1955 F200 pickup in it, which he did. Now it just so happened that at the next Saturday morning Black Cat Club Meeting, Buger Red bragged to everyone that his Mom and Dad had just bought a new truck. After the meeting everyone ran over to Buger Red's house to see it. Lo and behold, it was a brand, spanking new 1955 Ford F200 pickup. Pudgy couldn't believe his eyes! It was beautiful, but not so beautiful as it could be if he could get his grubby little hands on it.
Now, since Pudgy was only eight years old, he knew that he would have to have a lot of help if he was going to pull off what he had in mind. Buger Red's big brother was named Ricky. He had just turned 16, and for the past year or so Pudgy had noticed that he had been hauling old car bodies into Buger Red's back yard. In fact, he was out working on one of the old wrecks right then. Pudgy ran home and back as fast as his short, little legs would carry him. He ran out into Buger Red's back yard and ask Ricky, who was under one of the cars with only his feet sticking out, what he was doing. Ricky responded that he was making a hot rod. Pudgy couldn't believe his luck. He crawled right under the old car with Ricky and showed him the hot rod magazine with the customized 1995 Ford F200 pickup. Well, two kindred hot rod spirits were born right then and there, and the project was on. The only problem was how to get Ricky's and Buger Red's Dad to let them do what they needed to do to the pickup to really make it cool.
For the next six months everything needed to carry out the plan was put into place. Pudgy convinced all of the Black Catters to help, and he began to educate them in the world of hot rodding. One or two rides in Ricky's 1922 Ford T-Bucket hot rod was all it took. The even dozen Blackcatters could hardly fit into it, and when Ricky undid the cutouts (mechanism to bipass the mufflers) and burned the back tires for them, they were most impressed! Ricky soon started buying everything that was going to be needed for the customizing of his Dad's new pickup. Some of Pudgy's hot rod magazines showed how to do body work, how to paint, how to lower the front end, how to take the seats out, and even how to put dual exhausts on it too. While Pudgy was on vacation in San Diego, he had asked his Aunt Ann to take him to a hot rod paint shop that was in one of the magazines where he bought two gallons of metallic burple paint - a wild, shinny purple color. When Pudgy got back home, they were finally all ready.
Now Ricky and Buger Red and had been working on their poor, unsuspecting Dad for months and months and had finally received permission to "fix up the pickup a little bit one of these days." Well, "one of these days" finally arrived for the boys as their Dad was called out of town on the work train. This meant that he would be gone for one full week. Buger Red called Pudgy and all of the Black Catters were notified within an hour. They had six days to do their dirty deed to the pickup. This project was so important that the Black Catters canceled their weekly Saturday Black Cat Club meeting and even skipped the Saturday afternoon matinee. Buger Red's Dad had a nice big garage where all of the boys came each and every day early to begin work. Tubo's big brother worked at a service station, and he got them a big grinder that they used to grind all of the yucky, green paint off from the pickup. Of course, the grinder made a few nicks and holes here and there when one of the Black Catters let it slip or stayed too long in one place. They just filled these little mistakes up with a little body putty. The pickup really looked weird when they got it down to all bare, shinny metal. Pudgy said that it looked like a plucked chicken. They borrowed a paint spray gun and sprayed the naked metal with black hot rod primer, sanded it a little and then they sprayed on the metallic, burple paint. They thought that it was beautiful! While all this was going on, Booper and Bunky took out the seat and the door panels and sent them to be tucked and rolled in black, shinny naugahide in Nogales, Mexico. Rez and Nacho borrowed a torch form Rez's Dad's equipment shed and heated the front springs until they sagged so much that the frame was almost resting on the front axle. When they got through, the front bumper was so low that it would knock over a small block of wood. They took the big, fat back tires off from Ricky's hot rod and put them on the back of the pickup. With the lowered front end and the big tires on the back it was really degoed (the front low to the ground and the back high up in the air). Ricky and Chino worked for two days and finally got the headers and the dual exhaust pipes with steel packed mufflers put on. Wow, did it sound cool. You could hear that powerful motor for blocks the moment it started up. They were almost finished by the end of the fourth day with just two more things left to do to make the custom job complete. The crowning items were a big monster head to be painted on the rear tailgate and the blue, glass dots to be put into the taillights.

Now Pudgy had been working on the monster head for months and he had it all planned out in his mind. It was going to be a cross between Dracula and the Werewolf with pointed ears and big, curved fangs - enough to scare the pants off from anyone. It took Res, who was a very good artist, about four hours to paint Pudgy's monster head on the tailgate - scary, scary, scary man! No one would ever, ever tail-gate (follow too close) this cool hot rod! After letting it dry over night, Res sprayed some kind of clear stuff on it and the beautiful, cool, wonderful CUSTOMIZED, 1955 FORD F200 ,BURPLE, DAIGOED, PICKUP HOT ROD was ready! All of the Black Catters hopped into the back of the pickup for the maiden voyage as they rolled out of Ricky's garage. Pudgy, Ricky and Buger Red proudly sat on the soft tuck and roll naugrahide front seat. Ricky tried to look as cool as possible as he grabbed the steering wheel spinner knob and turned the corner and headed down the street to drag main.
Now every Saturday evening all of the teenagers drug main and tonight was no exception. It was just getting dark as the Black Catters pulled onto main in their cool hot rod. Every eye was on them as the rolled down main street. Pudgy noticed how all of the girls seemed to stare at Ricky as he cooly smiled as he revved the hot rod and racked out the dual steel packed mufflers (made them sound loud) . After dragging main they cruised over behind the high school where there was a tall, block-long concrete wall. All of the hot rodders always revved up their machines on the street along this wall and the let the cool sound of their pipes roar their sweet sound of pure power as they took their foot off from the gas. The sound would echo back and forth between the big wall and the three-story brick high school. Ah, how sweet it was to hear those roaring steel packed dual mufflers rattle the windows of the high school. They then cruised on down to the gathering place of the all of the teenagers­the Dairy Queen. The Black Catters couldn't believe that they were actually in the middle of all of this attention as they pulled into the Dairy Queen.
Every kid at the Diary Queen gathered around their hot rod saying things like, "Cool man! Where did you get this?". The Black Catters lapped up every jealous look and word of praise letting everyone know the contribution each had made to the customized hot rod. Pudgy and Rez couldn't believe how much everyone liked their monster head! After everyone had a chocolate dipped cone, they all mosied over to their cool hot rod and got loaded up. As Ricky started it up, he reeved the engine to make sure everyone heard their neat dual pipes. When he was sure everyone was looking, he popped the clutch smoking the rear tires as they darted out onto the street. There was a large crash, smash and bang as they broadsided a family trying to pull into the Dairy Queen from the street. Luckily they weren't going fast yet and no one was hurt. It was only a fenderbender. However, the police came and hauled all of the Black Catters and Ricky down to the jail.
For the next two hours the parents of the 13 boys arrived one by one to pick up their little criminals. The hot rod was driven home that night by Buger Red's Mom and not by Ricky. They next day when their Dad got home, what went on at their house was never discussed publicly, except for a few choice comments by Buger Red's Dad some time later. It seems that once the light of day fell on the body work and paint job, their were lots of nicks, gouges and other unsightly problems. The tuck and roll upholstery soon began to stink when it rained, and they found out that it had been stuffed with dried horse manure. The front springs had been heated so much that everytime the pickup went over a small bump, the axle and frame smashed into each other jarring the occupants to the bone. The steel packed mufflers were so loud that the police finally told Buger Red's Dad he would have to take them off and replace them. Pudgy and the entire Black Cat Club were dismayed when a few months later Buger Red's Dad traded their cool hot rod in for another pickup.
Almost forty years have come and gone since Pudgy Perkins and the Black Catters had their first boyhood love affair with hot rods. Only a hot rodder can understand the disease that afflicted them then and even still afflicts them now as grandpas­the love of the looks and feel of a cool, lean, mean, powerful machine­the American Hot Rod.

 

 

 

PUDGY PERKINS AND THE BLACK CAT CLUB

- The Bat Cave -

By Richard Logan Brimhall


Once upon a time, not so far away and not so long ago lived a little runt named Pudgy Perkins. He was a scallywag, a little poochies and a little munchkin all rolled into one. He was eight years old, had lots of freckles, was short with a belly like Santa Claus and he had bright red hair. He always wore a white T-shirt, black and white high-top tennies and Levis that were his pride and joy as they were so dirty that they could stand alone in corner of his room when he took them off at night. Above all else, Pudgy was perhaps best described as mischievous -- he was a perpetual accident just going somewhere to happen. His sly little grin and the spinner atop his beanie cap, that he had saved Post Toasties Cereal box-tops to get, spoke loudly and clearly that this kid was a little mover and a shaker
Pudgy's Mom was really a good cook. This was one of the reasons Pudgy had such a fat little belly. He was very well fed, and he made sure that he always got more than his skinny big sisters. His mom canned peaches, pears, apricots and other fruits. At night he liked to sneak into the pantry, get a quart of peaches and a loaf of his Moms homemade bread. He would woof it all down while in his bed and then roll the bottle under the bed with all of the others. The only part he didn't like about all of this was that his Mom made him go with her to pick the fruit. One time she had taken him to a very special place to pick wild grapes. She had made the best grape jelly he had ever tasted in his life. He would take the loaf of home made bread, stick his little hand deep into the loaf and pull out the soft, yummy center and eat it. Then he would fill the center hole with wild grape jam and head for his room.
It was on the occasion that his Mom took him to pick grapes in Jack's Canyon, that he made a marvelous discovery in the canyon. The canyon was about 80 feet deep with many cliffs that were covered with the wild grapes. As he was picking wild grapes at the bottom of one of these high cliffs about sundown one evening, he noticed that something high above his head seemed to fly right out of the cliff wall. Then there were hundreds and then thousands of them. They were bats, thousands and thousands of bats flying everywhere. The next day when he returned with his Mom and sisters to pick more grapes, he went to the same spot to study the face of the tall cliff more carefully. After a few minutes he saw it. A dark hole in the rock face almost covered by the vines about ten feet from the top. It was a cave! Pudgy had discovered a real, live batcave just like batman had or was it Dracula. He showed his Mom. They climbed out of the canyon and lowered Pudgy on a rope down the ten feet from the top of the cliff wall.
As Pudgy stumbled into the cave, there was a weird smell. He felt like he was walking in sand or in tiny, soft pebbles. He shined the flashlight down to discover what looked liked tons of little rat droppings (guano or manure). They were dry and soft and didn't smell too bad. Then he heard it. It was a soft, high-pitched chirping sound. He shined the light up towards the roof of the cave and there they were. Zillions and zsillions of little, black bats hanging upside down from the roof of the cave. Instant terror was struck into Pudgy's heart as he knew they were all going to drop down and bite him in the neck. Pudgy screamed, turned and ran for the opening as fast as his short little legs would carry him. As he hit the daylight he remembered just in time that he was running out into thin air. He barely grabbed the dangling rope in time. His Mom and sisters pulled him up screaming and kicking all the way. This was the end of the bat cave adventure­at least he thought it was.
The following Saturday he went to the movies at the Saturday afternoon matinee at the Rialto Theater with the other Black Catters as usual. It was a very exciting adventure about a group of men who were mining bat manure in the Grand Canyon, the same funny smelling stuff that he had found on the bat cave floor in Jack's Canyon. The guys in the movie had a huge cable car that they used to take the bat "guano", as they called it, up from deep in the canyon where the gigantic, ancient caves were located. It was a really exciting movie with the bad guy and good guy fighting each other as they were coming up from deep in the canyon on top of a cable car full of bat guano. All the next week the movie kept coming back into Pudgy's mind. A plan was beginning to form. A brilliant, brilliant plan!
As Saturday rolled around and the time was turned over to Pudgy for the a Black Cat Club activity, he finally knew what he was going to do. "Fellow Black Catters, I know how we are going to get rich, filthy, filthy rich! We are going to be even richer than Donald Duck's Uncle Scrooge!" They all sat down on the floor and listened intently as Pudgy talked. He told them about his discovery of the bat cave at Jacks Canyon. Collie Dog connected it up right away with the movie they had seen last Saturday afternoon at the Rialto Theater. Pudgy said, "We are you going to become bat "neuger" miners and get rich!" "What does nuger mean, asked Chino? Pudgy responded, "Nuger is what my Dad calls it. You know, it's the bat guano or the little tiny droppings they make. My Dad told me that they sell the bat guano for fertilizer because it really makes plants grow great!" "How are you going to mine it? We don't have a cable car." said Wee Willie. Pudgy explained how he had gotten into the cave, and that they could put a couple of guys down there and then lower buckets down on ropes. The two guys in the bat cave would then fill the buckets using their shovels. The Black Catters up above would then haul up the buckets, dump them in the back of a pickup and then put the bat neuger in paper bags so they could sell it. The only trouble with their plan was that they needed a way to get out to Jacks Canyon and somebody's pickup to haul the bat guano in so they would sell it house to house and become rich. Who would help them. Buger Red piped up, "I think my Mom will help us. She took us out to the airport to buy the parachutes, remember!" "Yeah that's right!", everybody said. "Let's go ask her right now."
Buger Red's Mom said yes, and everything was set up for the following Saturday morning. Shovels, buckets, ropes and sacks were gathered during the week and at 8 o'clock Saturday morning, all of the boys climbed into the back of Buger Reds Dad's 1955 Ford F200 pickup and headed for Jack Canyon and a great, new adventure. Pudgy showed them where to back the pickup up close to the edge of the cliff just over the bat cave. The Black Catters tied the ropes to the bumper of the truck and down went Pudgy followed by Buger Red. They both got to the ledge of the cave entrance and called for the other Black Catters up on top to pull up the ropes. They tied the buckets onto the ropes and lowered them back down. Inside the buckets were two torches that had been made of rags covered with grease and fuel oil. The plan was to put them in the cave for a few minutes and smoke all of the bats out just like they had seen the men do in the movie.

They lit the big torches and threw them as far into the cave as they could and sure enough, the bats began to fly out of the cave. Pudgy and Buger Red hugged the side of the cave entrance for dear life as the zillions and zillions of bats flew by. After about five minutes, they were all gone and the two bat guano miners got to work as soon as the shovels were lowered down. It didn't take more than an hour until they had the whole back of the pickup full of bat manure. In fact, the Black Catters up on top couldn't sack it fast enough to keep up with the tigers who were working in the cave.
The miners finally scrambled up the ropes to the top. They were covered from head to foot with black dust. In fact, they were so dirty even after trying to clean themselves off that they had to ride back to town sitting on the piles of bat guano and sacks in the bed of the pickup. The rest of the afternoon was spent in getting the rest of their black, stinky gold bagged up and ready for selling.
Every kid hit the streets of the neighborhood after school everyday for the rest of the entire week. More money came in that week than the Black Catters had ever seen. Pudgy had a sales speel that was so slick that every Black Catter copied it. It went something like this, "Well, good afternoon Mrs. Robinson. Did anyone in your family see the movie last week about the guano mines in the Grand Canyon? I thought so. Did you know that we have our own guano mine right here, and it produces the richest fertilizer in the whole world. I just happen to have a bag of this marvelous stuff for your very own garden right here. It will make your vegetables grow better than you have ever seen in your life. They will be bigger, juicier, tastier and better for you than anything you have ever eaten in your whole life, if you use our Black Cat Bat Guano. See it says it right here on the bag­GENUINE BLACK CAT BAT GUANO." They had sold every little ensy-itsey-bitesy bat turd by Thursday afternoon.
The Black Cat Club Saturday morning meeting was held right on schedule at 10:00 a.m. and most of it was spent just trying to count all of the money they had made. When the final tally came it, they had earned two=hundred and fifty-two dollars and thirty one cents­a veritable fortune! Most of the money was in coins and one dollar bills. The Black Catters rolled in the money like they had seen old Uncle Scrooge McDuck do in the Donald Duck comic books they all collected.
Chino was the first to say the inevitable, "Let's go get some more guano and get richer and richer!" Everyone yelled in agreement except Pudgy and Buger Red. They had to make the sad announcement that there was not more guano left in the cave. The one pick-up load was all that there was.
It was really a shame that there was no more GENUINE BLACK CAT BAT GUANO as the gardens in the Black Cat Club neighbor grew that season like they had never grown before. Every family that used the guano wanted more and Pudgy's guarantee of the best vegetables they had ever grown came true.
Two-hundred and fifty-two dollars and thirty one cents was so much money that the Black Catters could hardly stand it. It was burning a hole in their pockets like you can't imagine. What to do with the treasure? Pudgy had the answer and what a scheme it was, but that's another story.

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